6 November 2012
Connie the conman thought it'd be funny
To try and print some counterfeit money
It'd make his retirement ever so sunny
The ink was still wet and the Queen all runny
He went to the bank to pay it all in
Coolly and calmly he strolled within
Fixed the cashier with a toothy grin
Said I've been to the track and had a big win
The cashier eyed him up and thought what's this about?
Last time I saw Connie he had all but nowt
There's a procedure in place should I have a doubt
Reached into his drawer and got his weapon out
Connie's been a conman since I don't know when
Pulling tricks and kidding kidders from the age of ten
In and out of Wandsworth and he's going back again
'Cos he wasn't any match for an ultraviolet pen!
Connie • Opuss № I