2 July 2012
Remote controls are everywhere
And not just for TV
Used to make do with just one
Now there's at least three
They used to be so simple
For me to operate
Just trying to change the channel
Leaves me in a state
Pick up the remote
Whilst lying on my bed
Try to put on ITV
The lights come on instead
It's at least three feet long
I built a special shelf
Enlist somebody's help 'cos
You can't lift it by yourself
Try to use the blu-ray
Watch a film you want to see
Try operating that one
Without a science degree
And telly ain't just telly
Now it's Internet as well
I've thrown the thing across the room
Remote controlled death knell
So then, with more buttons
Than a haberdashery
It seems remotes control you too
Automatically
But you cannot battle progress
Don't put up a fight
Just press the big red button
Turn it off, thank you, goodnight
And with remotes controlling
Every facet of my life
I wonder if they make one
To remote control the wife...
Remote • Opuss № I