11 February 2013
First one out this morning And it's snow and ice I see Thought I'd warn the missus Via modern technology
I had to send a message For I feared what might come next Turned to dear old Siri For a safe and hands free text
He asked me for a name Five attempts, it took Before he found the one I'd said In my iThings address book
My road awareness wasn't utmost I'm afraid to say its true Siri, It's Really Important That I get this message through
Concentration wavering Other drivers had a fright For I had to keep an eye on him To make sure the text was right
Because everything I said Was met with 'I don't understand' Surely It Really Isn't What Mr. Jobs had planned
Seriously, It Really Isn't A clever thing to do Pull over and use your iThumbs Is my advice to you
Send, It's Rather Important Finally I had won After who knows what to whoever And a voicemail for my mum
Oh modern technology It would have been quicker, better To buy a pen and paper And send my wife a letter
Siri, It's Really Irritating I don't think you'll be staying When you don't seem to understand A bloody word I'm saying
It should have been so easy Instead, my nerves you got upon By the time you sent my message All sign of snow and ice had gone
If this comes up again I'll use my common sense Don't think I'll rely on Artificial intelligence
As for you, Mr. Siri You should have stayed in bed Instead of accident prevention You nearly caused me one instead
But it's over, and we're safe I haven't heard another peep Perhaps it's just too early And he's gone back to sleep
Another hopeless gadget A spark from Apples flame As the Japanese will tell you Siri by nature, Siri by name...
The Japanese For 'Silly' • Opuss № I