23 April 2012
By Bai:
She was everything and I was nothing. Of course, I was everything to her too. That's how love stories work. But I was nothing to myself. As most teenagers are. I was sad and always getting lost in my mind. The only thing that kept me happy was her. Being with her. Seeing her face. I guess you could say she saved me from myself. It's funny cause I never thought I could be saved. Never thought I could do anything right, certainly not make someone fall in love with me. But I did. And so did she. She always seems to notice the little things. People's reactions, inner emotions. At least with me anyways. Like when I was crying in the bathtub, drunk. And she said all these things she loved about me. One thing that really stuck was "I love how you always walk around smiling and happy, but I know you're hiding something on the inside." in that moment my heart just stopped for a second. I just thought to myself "How did she know that?" Over and over and over I asked myself that. It was like she found out a secret that no one knew but me and I couldn't figure out how she found out. He I let her in so close. No one's ever made it this far. I'm always pushing people away. But not her. In fact, I'd do anything just to always be holding her close. Every once in a while I just have to stop in breathe before the thought of her touch makes my heart explode. Her laugh is contagious, she has the cutest face, everything about her is just.. perfection. I want to kiss every freckle on her face.
All of this is so great, and beautiful. It's also the scariest thing I've ever had to endure. I'm just waiting for the day she wakes up and decides to be done with me. Just like everyone else has. I'm just hoping she won't. She's different. She's not like anyone else. This is real. I have to remind myself of that constantly. I'd do anything to keep her happy. If she wanted me to go away forever, I would. That's a lie. I'd stay around just hoping she'd want me again. I wish she was here. I want to kiss her soft face and hold her cute hands. I want to cuddle and fall asleep in each others arms. All of these thoughts cloud my brain from thinking anything else. Like a robot but with feelings, set on only thinking of her. Because she is everything. And I am nothing.
My Girlfriend Wrote Me This: • Opuss № I