20 May 2012
I get it now. my dad won't let me try new dangerous things. I get it now. my girlfriend wanted to learn how to longboard. she was so uncoordinated and I couldn't stand her trying such a dangerous thing. I'm great at long boarding and wanted her to be too, but not if she could fall. she wanted to try something a little risky and I just couldn't let her. I don't want my baby to get hurt. then she fell. she fell and fucked up her ankle. that was it. I fell to the ground and held her head in my lap. I hated myself so much for letting her do it. she whined that her ankle hurt and I wanted her pain instead. I wish I could have taken it from my sweet innocent princess. she was so vulnerable and I didn't want her to fall. I get it now. I can't explain her soft skin and her nervous face as she barely made it down the hill. I wanted to hold her in my arms and hide her from any potential danger. she wanted to learn though. she wanted to do something risky. just like I always do. I couldn't let her because I was so nervous she'd get hurt again. I get it now. I feel almost like a parent to her at times. and as a girlfriend to her. I love her in all the ways one can love something: physically, romantically, mentally, and like family or friends. I can't explain the weird feeling I have. I want to protect her from everything. just so I can see her smile and feel safe.
protect • Opuss № I