mysticall
Watching a hobbit high on sugar running down a hill in ill fitting flip flops is almost as much fun as being the hobbit running down the hill :P
A stone alter with scarlet blood flowing down the stones. A small girl with long black hair in an old Victorian night dress standing with a sacrificial dagger in her hand. The image zoomed in out of focus as the teenage girls head was pound…
'The opposite of Sparkle is Darkle'
One day, many years after the Clinton scandal, Hillary is struck by a car and killed. Soon, Hillary finds herself at the gates of Heaven. She sees St. Peter and asks "Can I get into heaven now?" He says "Soon, I have some things to take …
Morris walks into Dr. Cohen's office and puts a note on the table in front of the doctor. The note reads, "I can't talk. Please help me!" The doctor thinks for a while and says to Morris, "Put your penis on the table here." Morris think…
There's an old priest who got sick of all the people in his parish who kept confessing to adultery. One Sunday, in the pulpit, he said, "If I hear one more person confess to adultery, I'll quit!" Well, everyone liked him, so they came up…
At the retreat, Jill and John are each told to write a sentence Using the words 'sex' and 'love'. Jill writes, 'When two mature people are both passionately and deeply in love with one another to a high degree and they respect each other ve…
Some call it a glorified life, Others an amazing chance Whereas I call it not glory or an amazing chance but a gut-wrenching curse in a god forsaken excuse for an existence I am cursed to the night I may not enter the light If I do I wil…
.(\_/) (='.'=) c(")_(") Not sure what to categorise this as
Me just walking into a lesson near the end of it Teacher: where have you been? Me: what do u mean? Teacher: your late Me: am I?? Teacher: you've missed a whole period Me: ARE U TELLING ME IM PREGNANT?? Lol so worth the break detention
Your slipping away underneath the murky waters of death I never loved another and I will never love again When I was angry I said I didn't love you but that was never true No matter what I always loved you But now your disappearing to fas…
If you could be anyone what would you be? If you could be anything what would you be? I wouldn't be a bird though they have power and can soar high and low can they still process our thoughts? Can they feel our emotions? I wouldn't be a cel…
Your hands slip over me and over my life You gently crush it I used to feel pain now I feel nothing at all I am merely numb Maybe this time they'll let me stay with you Every time I get near they stop me and pull me back I'm tired of wa…
I started off as a nothing, As a screwball But then I learnt the tricks and secrets of the trade and I rose to the top so quickly it made my head spin I was the top, everyone was below me All eyes were on me All it took to fall to the bott…
Dark humour isn't ever bodies cup of liquified dead baby
Secrets, Secrets should be kept in the darkest corners of your heart and soul You should never let them go They hold the truth and the lies to all the worlds secrets No matter what may happen no matter who you trust you should never let…
A secret door, hidden behind metal chains which are tied so tight around it it is impossible to pull a chain. Behind that door is a room filled with hidden memories, for instance when we first met Your smile Your hug Our first kiss Christ…
I want to tell you, But I am bound to secrecy. I can not break that oath I must keep you safe and bury you in my heart. I must keep you safe I wish to tell you but deep down I know it will never be so It will be this way till I am old and…
Why do squirrels swim on their backs? To keep their nuts dry
How can I tell you I love you? How can I explain what really happened? Please listen to me this is important I love you but you won't listen to me Please just listen to me I love you I would do anything for you just to see you smile agai…
How can I tell you I love you? How can I explain what really happened? Please listen to me this is important I will probably disappear before I've told you That I love you I would do anything for you just to see you smile again not at me…
How can I tell you I love you? How can I explain what really happened? Please listen to me this is important I will probably disappear before I've told you That I love you I would do anything for you just to see you smile again not at me…
Missing you is all I think about... Missing you is all I know... Missing you is all I have... I'm sorry I never meant to do what I did to you... Please... Forgive me... I love you and only you... Please take me back... I hurt you so much..…