16 April 2012
Tim sits motionless in his seat looking mournfully at the plate of food before him. For the 40 years they had been married Sarah had always served a poached egg with toast for breakfast... Today he was served cornflakes.
"what's this?" he feebly whimpered. "sorry dear don't have time to make your usual" came the reply. Tim started to well up with sadness, had it really come to this he thought to himself.
Ever since she started watching eastenders instead of corrination street she was different.
"that's it!!" shouted Tim, the words streaming out of him like shit from a fat baby's bum. "no more fucking eastenders for you".
Next week Tim starts watching homes under the hammer and becomes a scientologist.
Adventures In Tim Land • Opuss № I