My Heart

I gave something to her, something that I have never given out.
I finally found someone worthy, one I could not live without.

Many times before, I had tried giving others this,
only to be rejected before ever experiencing a kiss.
Finally I had accepted this and built my own bliss,
which was located in my own deep, dark abyss.

She lifted me from the dark world I had boxed myself in.
She was the smile on my face and the joy felt within.
She was my best friend and I loved to call her my girlfriend.
She talked of marriage and one day having our own children.

I was always there to comfort her when it was needed,
even though she always found ways to call me conceited.
Even a day spent without her, left me feeling depleted,
but everyday I was privileged to see her left me completed.

Grasping hold of her in person, was the greatest feeling.
Touching her lips on mine had me higher than the ceiling.
Cooking food and doing housework with her had me thinking,
that maybe one day soon we could be ready for the marrying.

No one could have seen the path our relationship would take,
and the monster I would turn into unable to see the big mistake.
She let go of me, after I had constantly made her heartache,
and slowly the darkness surrounds me but is something I can't shake.

My abyss that I was taken from is becoming more prevalent.
Being alone seems to be the answer even though not intelligent.
She says in May we can start new, but that doesn't seem evident.
For I fear we will grow apart and lose the feelings of sentiment.

Only time will tell whether there is more to this story,
and currently the thought of that is becoming very scary.
I am not ready to end this and am willing to carry,
all the pain this has caused and hope she can see I'm sorry.

I gave my heart to her, and my heart is something I have never given out.
I finally found someone worthy, someone one I could not live without.

January 28, 2013