Titanic 3DD

@4181jay

Exaggeration

My wife complained that I'm prone to exageration, I nearly tripped over my cock..

@GucciAngel82

Birdy

Rainwater appears to be leaking through the roof of my aviary. It's really getting on my tits..

@tbhg92

Humpty dumpty sat on the bed Little Bo peep was giving him head As he came she started to weep She could tell by the taste he'd been shagging her sheep..

@tbhg92

Sick Joke

Q- what's red and runs up your leg. A- a homesick period..

@Mad4books

Eastenders

A man is watching TV and her wife comes down and says"I just fell down the stairs, did you not hear me?" Man,"Sorry i thought it was the start of Eastenders".

@Mad4books

Adults Water Fight

The kids next door have challenged me to a water fight... I'm just updating my status while i wait for the kettle to boil!.

@Mad4books

Who Needs It

who needs Jeremy Kyle..just come on Facebook...

@4181jay

Happy Marriage

When people ask how I manage to keep such a beautiful wife happy I tell them I use 3 little words on a regular basis- ro, hip and nol..