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Snowman

speed577
speed577 • 146 followers

Once there was a snowman,
So graceful and so cool,
He was just standing there , he felt like such a fool.

“I feel like a moran” he said one day,
“I just want to sing and play”
“well you can't”said the boy “you are just my little toy”

“please” said the snowman
“I want to move around,
I don't want my feet stuck here,freezing to the ground.

One day he called to the sun, he said “please help me mighty one”
I only really like my feet,
I want to be killed by your heat ”

He eventually went to heaven,
At the grand age of 11,
But alas, his feet stayed on the ground,
And never made another sound.

Hi,
I thought I might post some of my poetry.
I like posting my own stuff instead of others.
Please tell me what you thought.
Speed577

#childhood-imagination #existential-poetry #general #melancholy #personification #winter
speed577

@speed577

A lover of animals / not a bad poet/I'm not going to say my age but I'm under 18/I'm the kinda guy that tries to keep people happy but doesn't have much friends myself. Oh yeah and I'm Irish

61
Stories

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Comments & Feedback (7)

Stablish
Stablish
Apr 14, 2012 at 7:38 AM

It's good, I like it, keep up the good work

Stablish
Stablish
Apr 14, 2012 at 7:39 AM

(-:

speed577
speed577
Apr 14, 2012 at 7:59 AM

@Stablish thanks I didn't know if it was crap or good

nicwatt
nicwatt
Apr 14, 2012 at 8:26 AM

@speed577 genius!

speed577
speed577
Apr 14, 2012 at 9:58 AM

@nicwatt thanks so much

DakotaWilde
DakotaWilde
Apr 14, 2012 at 11:50 AM

Vgood. Best way to write poetry is too image the story in your head and write what you see and what you want your readers to see when they read it. I especially like the line from alas. Perhaps squeeze in a verse before he dies about how such as... The warm sunlight glistened in his head, and the sun beat down hotteras the snowman slowly said, goodbye to little boy who had made him and everything he sees as soon with the heat he would finely be free... Something like that written from your imagination

speed577
speed577
Apr 14, 2012 at 1:11 PM

Thanks @DakotaWilde I'll take that on board

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