Possibilities

Ugh...so I've decided to blog again. Mostly because I can't sleep. I just finished the book "The Fault In Our Stars," and thinking about it is keeping me awake. Ill probably write a review of it later...in case anybody gives a rat tooth about my opinion regarding it.
But aside from finishing the book into the wee hours of the morning, I also can't sleep because I have so much energy and because "Seasons of Love" from Rent is stuck in my head. It's a great song with wonderful harmonies but seriously its annoying after about 3 hours of it on repeat in mi cabeza (that's Spanish for "my head.")
My grandma, who I've mentioned in blogs over the summer, flew down from the island of Puerto Rico to the little shit town that is my personal hell. She's here to renew her driver's license and to see us. I'm happy that she's here but she's probably going to be super bored due to my family's hectic schedules.
Well a friend that I made when I was in NYC invited me to hang out, which is super exciting because she's the only person to want to hang out with me. But I don't blame anybody for not wanting to hang out with me, I've kinda been what people call a "Debbie Downer" lately and unapproachable.
So in my long lunches at school in solitude, I've noticed that a lot of my previous relationships was me caring for another person because they depended on me. It would be nice for me to be able to depend on someone else for a change.
At lunch the other day, I ran into this girl who I used to hang out with a lot. She is an aspiring actress and therefore very dramatic, and she has some like...she's not always aware of the acceptable way to act...I guess that's the best way to describe it.
The thing with her is that she can be overly dramatic and annoying, although it isn't her fault. I don't want to say that something is wrong with her, that she's mentally...different perhaps...or that she's "off," because I don't believe there to be a "normal" behavior. But she has some medical/social issues so it isn't her fault. It's science.
Anyway, there's this guy that I used to be friends with. He's into drama too and over the past year he has anxiety issues and...he's just a dramatic mess.
So he doesn't like the girl, whom I was siting next to that day as we studied independently. The girl and I weren't even talking. We were, again, studying. And he walked by and sat down with us to study as well, but when he saw her, he left angrily because he "just couldn't stand her."
Then later, a few minutes before the end of lunch, the girl leaves and the guy comes back and he starts bashing on her. He was rude. And he was going to but forgot to wear purple that day to represent anti-bullying day, meanwhile he was bullying the girl behind her back.
I was livid so I said, "Quit being a little bitch, INSERT NAME HERE."
And I dramatically walked away.
I hoped I did the girl justice. Maybe I should have defended her more, said something about how although she's dramatic and annoying sometimes, she's NEVER mean. She just wants to fit in, and nobody lets her so she seems over the top so people will pay attention. And it's not her fault that she is the way she is.
Also, this girl stood beside me when I was going through a funk a few years ago. And I lost touch with her, but the second we saw each other the first day of school, it was like we never stopped talking.
I like her. She's a sweetheart. And she reminds me of old times. I like the old times.
Those were the times before people became who they are in the new times. Before people realized the shittiness that exists in the world. Before those cigarettes were smoked. Before boyfriends and girlfriends were apparent. Before the unknowing future loomed so close. Before I was the miserable person that I am now.
Fuck this. I'll be out of here soon enough.