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Covert Train Guards

I am now convinced that London-Midland train guards have installed covert REM deep sleep sensing equipment in the seats. By doing this, they can know the EXACT optimum moment to burst into the carriages with a mighty yell and wake you to see your tickets.

waynedoz

@waynedoz

Six foot three bespectacled ginger-bearded designer and illustrator. I also poetify with rhymification. www.waynedorrington.co.uk

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Comments & Feedback (21)

They catch me every time!

Sneaky little TrainGuard Sleep Ninjas!@bryanrobertheap

Might be so Lol

@waynedoz crouching tiger, hidden ticket

@simplystylish @shanwan we must learn the way of the sacred guards. We must master the skill of their deadliest weapon: the Ticket Punch

@waynedoz earplugs my good sir...that is their Achilles heel!

How else are they going to put leaves on the line!

On the plus side, at least they wake you before the dribble starts to ooze out of the corner of your mouth, coupled with a light snorting..& you wake to find four Japanese exchange students staring open mouthed at this weary Englishman...

@Dovahkiin tried that - and earphones. They just poke you instead.

Good point well made @merlin1038

I have done the incomprehensible noise when dropping off before. I always fool everyone by incorporating it into a throat clearing cough. Genius. @SianRLD

@waynedoz try feigning sleep and play them at their own game then - grab their hand in mid-poke!

Like it @Dovahkiin - but they might mistake it for act of spontaneous passion?

@waynedoz not if it's accompanied by some harsh words and eyes like the devil!

@waynedoz they might quite like that though? Then I've got real problems

Haha well they better watch out before someone wakes up with really bad reflex! 😜

Good call @milkeyedmender

Hey from one wayne to another keep em coming bro

Last time I was on a train a ticket got punched.

@merlin1038 thanks other bearded Wayne!

That was no way for them to conduct themselves @yowwa

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