My Perfect Mistake

I don't check my phone & emails
For signs of you anymore
Unknown caller, withheld number
It's not you -
Of that I'm sure.

I no longer hesitate to ask you
Before I make decisions
Now, in life, the plans I make
Are my choice
And that's a given.

I sleep diagonally across my bed
I don't reach for you in the night
The insomnia that plagued me when you left
Has vanished out of sight.

When your name comes up in conversation
I'm calm & nonchalant
Ensuring my surrounding peers
Know it's no longer you I want.

My life has moved on, and really, I'm happy
Now I'm free of all the heartache
I've made some fuck ups in the past

But you were my one
'perfect mistake'

So I check my stitches daily
The ones I crafted to mend my heart
I'm fearful that just the scent of you
Could tear my handiwork apart

They say that time heals all wounds
But I've heard that one before
It's two years on..
Seems a lifetime's passed...

And I couldn't miss you more.