The short-sighted English teacher calls out,"You there at the back! Recite the poem I asked you all to learn!"
"I can't do that."
"May I ask what you were doing last night?" says the teacher.
"I drank a few pints with my mates, played some poker, did a few lines of coke and shagged my bird."
"That's unbelievable! I'm starting to wonder why you even bother coming to school."
"I'm here to repair the heating."
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