Ben, I'm still praying for you. I have this huge spot for you in my heart and I don't know why. I'm seeking Jesus on this and I'm praying that weed won't be an addiction or something you feel like you need. And I'm praying for both of us that alcohol becomes less of a struggle. I'm sorry for the example I set and the initial way I chose to show you love. That was worldly love, but this is not. I am praying that my brain would slow about you and my feelings would subside in some ways. I don't know that I could stay pure with you. I have an instant sexual energy draw to you and that's not love. That's wrong of me and it's why I'm praying against it and why I won't act upon it. I really want to spend more time with you. I'm praying for a few months down the road that we would still be close and that Rachel and I will be making you dinner in the Domain. I can't wait to see what God's going to do with this friendship. I just pray it's His will that we continue it. Goodnight, Ben.
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Ashlee Edwards
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