Elderflower

Every morning, I would slip unnoticed
Into the coffee shop, with a tinkle of a bell,
And seat myself at the table by the window
In the warm light that pours through the glass.
I would order elderflower cordial
In a glass bottle, with a straw
And sip at it slowly, flipping through
The dusty pages of a book.
You would sit behind the counter,
Chewing your nails and humming along with the radio
Happy and easily drifting along through life,
And not noticing me.

Over time, I would hang the bottles up
With thread in the walls of my heart,
And listen to them clink and ting against one another
Like a sweet, sad orchestra
That plays the same sad song.
I would walk underneath them, sometimes,
Running my fingers along their cold, flat bottoms
And sending ripples of chinks across the never ending
Forest of bottles which swing in the breeze.
If I turn into the wind,
At just the right angle, and breathe in deeply
The air would blow across them
In a symphony of songs
That will haunt my heart forever.
One day, I think, one day
I will cut all the threads and send the bottles
Tumbling earthwards,
Where they'll shatter, and spin
And skitter like fallen birds across the floor,
Ending, ending, ending!

I long for you, I wish for you!
I want to be the reason you are in this world!
I want to have you for my own
And run my fingertips along your eyelids
With your breath on my skin.

Now I am walking in.
"May I help you?"

"Elderflower cordial, please"