inkypiano
I hate it when we have to analyse poetry at school. I often find that a poem is like a joke or a frog; once you dissect it, it dies.
I hate when people much thinner than me say that they're 'fat'. They don't even think about the fact that their pathetic attention-seeking comments may hurt people like me who maybe can't wear size 6 and maybe don't want to think about the …
90% of the time, when someone texts 'gtg' they're just bored of talking to you.
People think I'm shy because I don't talk much or participate in conversations. The truth is I don't give a f*** what they're talking about.
Don't you hate when you're watching a film with your parents and they talk constantly?
When you just walk along the street carrying an empty wrapper because you can't find a bin...
Anyone else zone out mid-conversation and pretend to know what the other person is saying?
*puts iPod on shuffle* *skips through fifty songs*
How is it that when someone asks you your name, which has been your name all your life, you still go 'uh' before you tell them?
He reminded me of a shackled beast at first, the man that life dragged my way. His bloodied, raw wrists were incased in choking chains, every bit of him was beaten, bruised and bleeding. His chest was the worst, a mass of scars and burns ar…
Haven't posted on Opuss for...argh, I don't know.
(In a debate over watching Saturn 3 or Deep Space 9) Sheldon-I suggest rock paper scissors...lizard Spock. Raj-What? Sheldon-Oh, It's very simple. Scissors cuts paper, paper covers rock, rock crushes lizard, lizard poisons Spock, Spock sm…
Turn to the sun and the shadows will fall behind you- Maori Proverb
Black. White. Red. Colours of a joke he recalled, but now there was no laughter, only his own screams as he ran, ran forever through the Hell he'd fallen into. No way out, no way back. The night was black. It followed him at every turn, …
Sometimes it's impossible to separate the twins of love and pain, so the only way to carry on is to suffer one for the other. -Me
For some reason I've always found this funny. 'Have you any commission from your lord to negotiate with my face?' -Lady Olivia, Act One Scene Five of Shakespeare's Twelfth Night.
Cats don't mind sharing the bed with fellow cats, as long as the area is equally divided between them. Usually there is room for everyone on a first-come-first-served basis:Under the blanket, on top of the blanket, on the pillow, under the …
Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
Live slow. Die eventually. Leave an indifferently attractive corpse. -David Mitchell
What is this thing they call normal? Is it contagious? OMG DON'T TOUCH ME! I might catch your normal! Anonymous
It was getting a little crowded in Heaven, so God decided to change the admittance policy. The new law was that in order to get into Heaven, you had to have had a really bad day before you died. The policy would go into effect at noon the n…
The world is full of interesting coincidences, e.g Life's short is an anagram of rifle shots. Lex S.
Possibly one of the greatest descriptions of cheese ever, from QI Season 7 Episode 10 David Mitchell- It's gone off already. I mean, cheese, basically, hasn't it? Stephen Fry- Well that's it's point exactly, it is the celebration of what h…
I open my eyes for the first time, But I never saw her face. I hear people speak for the first time, But I never heard her voice. I don't know who she was, But somehow she is everything. I grow wiser, and learn of life and death, But I…
Perform a song. Those three words often reduced me to a state similar to a vegetable. Maybe a potato. On a good day, a leek. "It doesn't matter what it is, and you can pair up or form groups, but at least one of you has to sing. No backing…
Amy: Who are you and what do you want? The Doctor knows you but he's not telling me who you are. And he always does. Takes him awhile sometimes but he tells me. So you're something different. Dream Lord: Oh, so is that who you think you are…
"You gotta fight back someday, Laura." Jo said. I agreed with her, but I was biding my time. It would be so perfect that she would accept defeat. Hopefully. Let's call it a work on progress. Or no work and thus far, no progress. I had bett…
A boy. At first, I didn't know what was so special about him, but when I looked closer I recognised him from somewhere...yes! A video I'd seen of a concert, from the first year of Baywood that I'd missed. I wondered why I'd never seen him …
(On QI, Series 7 Episode 4.) Rob Friends of mine back in Wales, quite a few of them, have got Welsh . . . It's not a famous voice, but it's a Welsh sat nav, which basically goes, you know . . Stephen In the Welsh language? Rob No no n…
Can anyone give me some feedback on chapter one because I've never posted a story before and not many people read my writing, so I need some opinions. Thanks :)
I put romance as the category because it comes later on, but it's mostly drama and a little bit of satirical humour. Introducing the life of me, Laura Collins. I go to Baywood Arts high school...and that's all you need to know that's inte…
Music expresses that which cannot be said and on which it is impossible to be silent. Victor Hugo
A friend will help you move a sofa. A good friend will help you move a body. Your best friend will help you move your good friend's body. -Anonymous
Amy: One little girl crying. So? The Doctor: Crying silently. I mean children cry because they want attention. 'Cause they're hurt or afraid. When they cry silently it's 'cause they just can't stop.
"Oh, very good," interrupted Snape, his lip curling. "Yes, it is easy to see that nearly six years of magical education have not been wasted on you, Potter. "Ghosts are transparent." "Moronic though some of this class undoubtedly are, I exp…
'Pain is a weakness. Never allow yourself to be controlled by it. Never admit that you feel any. If you do, you have lost.' A rather depressing quote from an evil character in one of my plots. Wondering what any of you think of it?
Beautiful people don't know they're beautiful. People who think they're beautiful don't know that they're not.
"By all means continue destroying my possessions. I daresay I have too many." "It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities." "Humans have a knack for choosing precisely the things that are worst for …
(Watson sits down on a couch next to Sherlock, who is only wearing his bed-sheet) Watson-Are you wearing any pants? Sherlock-Uhhm, no. Watson-Ok. (Silence, then both laugh) Watson- Oh, I am seriously fighting an impulse to steal an ashtray…
"We are in Buckingham Palace, the very HEART of the British Nation. Sherlock Holmes, put your TROUSERS on!" -Mycroft Holmes, A Scandal in Belgravia.
Watson-Of course. Why didn't I see that? Sherlock-Because you're an idiot. Oh, don't be like that. Practically everyone is.
"Point is, people, don’t get lulled into a false sense of security, thinking he’s out of the country. Maybe he is, maybe he isn’t, but the fact remains he can move faster than Severus Snape confronted with shampoo when he wants to, so don’t…
It's a common misconception that when you're utterly drunk, you fall over a lot. WRONG. When you're drunk, the floor comes up to hit you in the face. -Anonymous
Not quite. Whoever said that obviously never tried slamming a revolving door. -Anonymous
The Doctor: Oh, what’s this then? I love this. A big flashy lighty thing. That’s what brought me here. Big flashy lighty things have got me written all over them. Not actually. Give me time. And a crayon. -The Eleventh Doctor
Don't just look at art, see it. Don't just hear music, listen to it. Don't just read a book, explore it. Don't just live your life. Enjoy it. -Lex Soulsby
They say you can't live without love, but I still think that oxygen is more important. X. X \ 0
Xander? If you ever decide to go, I want a warning. You know, big flashing red lights, and-and-and one of those clocks that counts down like a bomb in a movie? And there's a whole bunch of-of colored wires, and I'm not sure which is the rig…
Anya: Crap! Look at this. I'm burdened with a husband, and several tiny pink children, and more cash than I can reasonably manage… Xander: That means you're winning. Anya: Really? Xander: Yes. Cash equals good. Anya: Oh! I'm so pleased! Can…
'But I don't understand, I don't understand how this all happens, how we go through this, I mean I knew her, and now she's...there's just a body, and I don't understand how come she just can't get back in it and not be dead anymore. It's st…
It came because it couldn't stand to watch your children cry. What if you were really old, and really kind and alone? Your whole race dead, no future. What couldn't you do then? If you were that old, and that kind, and the very last of your…
Drip, drip, drip. The tunnels echo again and again with the sound of leaking water, Dripping from the ancient rocks which held up our home, Splashing onto the floor and splitting Into a million tiny shards of shimmering glassy infinity. Dri…
Last night I lay on my bed and gazed out at the stars, wondering- 'Where the heck is my ceiling?!'
Sometimes in life you get those moments when you fully realise how small you are in the working of the universe. You realise the fact that everything you do is pointless really, it won't affect the universe or even this planet, much. But wh…
Lanning (on Police Recording): Ever since the first computers, there have always been ghosts in the machine. Random segments of code that have grouped together to form unexpected protocols. Unanticipated, these free radicals engender questi…
I suppose we've always been afraid of the dark. The way it creeps round the corners and seeps under the doors. The noises you hear coming from it that could only be from some otherworldly creature damned to approach our beds in the middle o…
If it moves, it's biology, if it smells, it's Chemistry and if it doesn't work it's Physics.