Me

I came on this app to be myself.
I hide who I am from everyone else.
Whatever I write is truly me
But if I say it out loud my friends go 'woah that's way too deep'

So I keep the conversation with them light
I know it's wrong but somehow it doesn't seem right
My thoughts come to me late at night
So I lie awake, grab my iPod and start to write.

Maybe posting this is a mistake
But it's a risk I'm willing to take
Aware that it'll kinda make me look a fake
But gosh give a girl a break!

I wish you could understand
Once they know you they have the upper hand.
They have the control
You're left feeling like lost soul.
You don't need to be told.
People see what they want to see
So I'd rather them judge someone who I put on to be
Than it actually being me?
They judge you accordingly
From the clothes you wear
To the colour in your hair
I know that's not fair
But that's why I'm afraid to share
Finding genuine people who care
Is rare.

Don't get me wrong
Deep inside my mentality is strong
You can only pretend for so long
My heart is full of gold
I'm 19, I feel like I've been through it all, though I'm not old.

I guess there are something's you just can't say
And I'm sorry it's gotta be that way.
I hate to admit its the fear of being rejected
We all just want to be accepted

I've always been strong
The one that anyone can lean on.
My strength is what holds everyone together
But I won't be around here forever

Dont worry this isnt suicidal
Life I can handle
I won't cheat and take the easy way out
Lifes meant to be hard and kick you about

I'm guess I'm tired of putting on a brave face
When on the inside im a mess, I'm all over the place!

I guess it's down to me
I have a choice of who I want to be
Ill go with the best version of me
Itll be what I want everyone to see

People are naive
Looks can deceive
You show and tell them what they want to believe.

Thanks for reading (if anyone did)