Oops I Did It Again....Giggles, Gagging And Chucking Up

We've all done it...unwittingly insulted someone.
I have done it on many occasions and although I'm ashamed to admit it, and I know I'm digging myself a very big hole but me and my shovel will go down laughing....yes my friends I laugh when I shouldn't....it's got me in trouble ALOT.

I can't seem to help it, I have this defence mechanism
inside of me that when I know I've cocked up in true Kimbo style....I laugh!

Now my friends it's not cool and it's not polite, so if you have an inner suppressing button...USE IT!

Just the other week I saw a girl who I used to work with who had impressed me with her weigh loss, I told her how fantastic she looked but felt slightly embarrassed as I think I may have been partly something to do with that weight loss.

You see I had seen her a year before at a car boot sale, she was chatting in between eating her burger, as she was mid bite I asked,
"When is your baby due?"
She spluttered on the burger, her mother threw me a filthy look and I'm thinking,
'Oh shit'
She matter of factly replies that she's NOT pregnant, just obviously fat.

With her look of sheer horror, her mothers deathly glare, I do what I always do...giggle.
The glares get scarier and I'm laughing so much I simply have to walk away.
I'm mortified at my actions and you'll be pleased to know as a good citizen, I have since apologised.

Then there's the time at secondary school, a friend of mine, during a VERY boring Geography lesson may I add, decided to blow stringy snot out of his nose, let it dangle and swing from side to side, before sucking it back up, he kept repeating his boring lesson trick, which although grossly funny, he brought out another one of my Kimbo flaws....GAGGING.

I am a terrible gagger.

I kept telling him to stop but he just kept doing it, I'm gagging so much that I hide my head under the table, but I could still hear the sound of snot coming out, then being sucked up...

I promptly chuck up all over my friends sock and shoe. This then has a domino effect, so she starts gagging and this then sets off my giggling.

I'm laughing so much I get sent to the heads office, along with my friend and his snot trick.

I think I need to join some kind of self help group to control this inappropriate laughing.
As one day it's going to come back to bite me on the ass.

Maybe all those people that I've offended have their very own self help group and are plotting sweet revenge as we speak?

That or I'm going to end up a lonely old woman, with nine cats, a pot noodle and The Jeremy Kyle Show re-runs for company.

Hubby first became aware of my problem, after a few months of us dating, he broke his leg whilst drunk on a bouncy castle.....don't try it at home peeps...Beer and Bouncy castles don't mix.

He was taken to A+E, upon having an x ray he had in fact a spiral fracture and would need surgery.
When he heard this news the colour from his face just drained and when the nurse brought his pain relief I thought he was going to pass out.

He had a very real fear of needles, he is looking at me with pleading eyes, I'd never seen a grown man look so scared. In hindsight it could have been quite a romantic moment if it wasn't for the fact that I was giggling so much.

Giggling so hard that the nurse had to tell him to let go of my hand as due to my inappropriate behaviour she was unable to get the cannula in.

Once I had got over the shock of it all, my nursing him at home skills were second to none, I could have given old Florence Nightingale a run for her money.
I must have redeemed myself somewhat as he did ask me to marry him.

So now I've confessed a fraction of my rude behaviour I'm off to investigate this inner suppressing button thing, I wonder if I'll get it on the NHS?????