Confused

Im hiding in the corner of a giant sphere
Its called the world; oh how I do fear
All the evil; all those out to smear
I would not allow them to get so near

Im trying to light a fire under the freezing rain
Something to keep me warm; to keep alive my brain
A light of hope; a future for me to set out and gain
Just a way to stay on track; not go insane

After all we live in a world thats man-made
Relying on human minds; the semblance of a shade
Its in this swamp that I must tread and wade
In hope that the light doesnt flicker; that I dont fade

Into the backround; into backstage
Watch as they control me throughout my age
I never knew that this was a war I had to wage
To get my freedom from this rolling rage

From all the smoke; from all the mirrors
Used in my life to make my fears
Come true; like the crystal balls of seers
Its wih this knoweledge that I shed no tears

Cuz if a did; it would not matter
Theyd just say I was fine; stop my chatter
About the truth; but i needed a ladder
To get me to the top; where the glass shatters

They would put me in a box; keep me shut out
In a crazy room they dont hear me shout
Neither do I; could never keep count
Its my job to find the right route

They got me stuck in this pit; im choked in this hole
They smoking me out; twisting up my soul
Im injected with evil and its taking its toll
I gotta get right; take back what they stole

Gotta get my brain; no, its my heart I need
They got no mercy as I lay and bleed
On deaf ears fall my begs and pleads
My torturous yells they would not heed

They keep on pushing and pulling on my soul
Pulling so hard it tears and rips a hole
Letting all my thoughts drop down like coal
Worthlessness begins to take its toll

I see grey in a world of black and white
Poking round in the dark without a light
Trying to make sense of it all; tryna make it right
But it looks like I aint gonna win without a fight

Im ready for this battle but never for this war
Not ready for the death the blood and the gore
I dont wanna fight this way any more
Cuz my bodys aching and my hearts sore