Barmy Army

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A young boy found an ancient Koran
He was an estranged goat herder in Afghanistan
Each day he studied hard up in the mountains
His head full and his heart open he now had reasons with explanations

At thirteen he had a plan from a dream
Where his future life did play out before him
He was informed and assured he would be a future type king
His Koran would make the world peaceful, happy and all equal loving

His bloodline was long, pure and healthy
But he was an outcast in his family who were extremely wealthy
His father ordered him to complete his education in America
Said he needed to see the world and his distant cousins would get him far

At twenty three he returned to his homeland
No longer a boy now he was a wise young man
Trying hard to stay true to the holy Koran
But influences from long distant cousins warped is childhood dreamed plans

He told of the westerners daily sins
How they were controlled and had nothing to believe in
That they had lost their way and believed in governments
Corruption, greed, power were all taught well to him

He returned home as his father had just passed
The elder of his many siblings he needed to act fast
He offered many locals paid jobs at last
Amassing an army payed for from oil, drugs and a brainwashing master class

His army controlled with blood money and fear
Now two million battle hardened troops in under a year
Cunningly taking leadership from his countrymen in tears
Defending his land from western maniacs with opium and oil stained victory cheers

His generals asked why he was so power mad hungry
He replied his bloodline ties go back to the Obama family
That he was advised and warned to build a huge army
After a bet was lost at the Bush and Blair annual cock sucking conference party