Love You So: PART THIRTY THREE

This is the final chapter for this first story, I'll probably take a break from it for a week or so, then I'll follow it up! And don't worry, the sequel will feature all 3 people...

I spiralled downwards, into a heap on the floor. My bathrobe flooding around me, and my hair still wet, sticking to my face and my neck.
But in my head I was still falling, and as I fell down this ravine I saw flashes of images from my life: images that I would hope to cherish forever. Some I had forgotten, and some I remembered. Some were old, some were recent; but what they all shared was a single figure. I hadn't noticed him there before, but he was always there.
The first thing I saw was that summer in the Hamptons when I was 13, and I heard excerpts from Nate's journal. I saw us, younger and fresh faced on the beaches running with his dog Sam. We threw him balls and sticks into the ocean, and I saw the glee in my eyes. The golden sand was tickling my toes, and every inch of my body that had been sat on the sand moments before. I saw my happiness, and the love that was already radiating from his face.
The next thing I saw was my family, on my 16th birthday. They all sat around the grand table in front of my 3 tiered white chocolate cake. But none of them were smiling, and none of them were happy. That was the day we found out about my aunts cancer, and the somber faces matched the somber atmosphere that surrounded that day.
The next memory I saw was Mollie, Nate and I on that same day, we'd got soaking wet in the rain, so we all went to my room to change. I offered everyone a shower, and before I knew it, we were all fully clothed in the wet room, spraying each other with the shower head. All the jets were on, and I remembered totally relaxing and smiling; in a way I could never imagine after hearing such devastating news. I totally relaxed, and that was when I realised I had two of the best friends the world could ever wish for: two friends who were ready to stick by me no matter what happened, and were willing to make me laugh in my darkest hours.
The tunnel around me got darker as I remembered my darkest memory: the memory that covers my head with a veil of solitude and mourning. I didn't see everything of that memory, as it filled my head all the time, but I heard the heart rate monitors beep continuously, and I heard people rushing around me to try and revive my already dead aunt.
That was when I truly started falling, my acceleration increasing and everything becoming darker. I was losing sight of life above me. And all I could see was Nate, his face when I first kissed him, his face when he first told me he loved me, and his face when I'd come down the marble staircase last night. I cried out in my head, but no one could hear my screams. I was truly alone, more alone than I'd ever been. I wanted to see him one more time, to hold him in my arms and to tell him I loved him. I wanted to tell him all about how I'd loved him my whole life: I felt I hadn't made it clear enough. I wanted him to know he was the only boy I've loved, the only boy I love and the only boy I will ever love.
As I tried to cling onto these truly precious memories that were floating away from my outstretched fingers, I began to feel an emotion creep over my mind that I hadn't felt since my 16th birthday: despair. My mind was filled with desperation, but I lacked the energy now to care or to do anything about it. As I felt my neck drooping, and my head beginning to droop to, I looked once more upwards, back up to where I'd come from, and I saw his face, his golden hair glowing in the darkest recesses, and his eyes sparkling. Instead of providing me with hope for the future, the light I associated with Nathaniel Cole was fading. Despair covered my eyes, and a deep depressed feeling flooded through my body, until it punctured my soul.
But I kept falling, until I couldn't see him any more. All I could hear was his voice, echoing over and over in the dark, bottomless pit.
"I got on the bus a boy, and I never got off the bus. I still haven't. I'm still as in love with you now as I was then. And I don't think I'll ever get off that bus."
His words flew at me like a bombardment in a war: a war in the darkness where the soldiers are all blind.
As I got blinder and blinder to what was going on around me, his speech became more simplistic until they were reduced to five one syllable words: "I love you so much" which slowly reduced to "Love you so".
I kept falling, not knowing when I'd stop, not knowing when I'd be saved, the only thing I knew for sure was that Nate loved me, as that simple phrase flooded through my mind it held back the despair and the negativity that was looming over me, waiting to seize my soul from him.
"Love you so"

Thank you all for reading this. When I first started writing it I had no idea where I was going with it or that anyone would like it! So thank you to everyone who's liked them, or commented with such lovely feedback, I love you all! I know this might not be the end you all wanted, but this isn't quite the end! As I said, I'll be back in a week or so, so check back then :)