Loner

I don't know why
I can't say
I'm too lost
I don't know the way
I'm always like this
I'm terrified
Of new people
Especially guys.
I can't do it
I can't date
I can't hang out
It's this I hate
This constant fear
Of the unknown
Of it making me sick
I must outgrow
I feel nauseous
I wish they wouldn't
Try to be friends
I know I shouldn't
Be this way
But it's too painful
To change that with new people
I'm disdainful.
I must get past it
That will require work
But I can't do it
Because it hurts.