She Saved My Life (11) / He Chose Me.

I started walking away. I didn't care if the others went with me or not. We had to part ways anyway.
I didn't turn back.
I set my sight on the path in front of me.

Something was touching my shoulder. I turned my head. "Hmmn?" I was surprised to see Dan standing there. He handed me a piece of paper that had numbers written neatly. "Text me?!" he pleaded. "Uh... Yeah. Sure.." I answered, stunned. Then he ran back the other way, until he became a tiny dot in the distance. I put the number in the front zip of my bag.

I reached the bus stop. I scanned the time schedule, there would be a bus in ten minutes.
I breathed a sigh of relief.
I could finally take my ever so heavy bag off.
I took it off and waited for the bus. - - -

Finally it came, I hopped on and paid the driver.
It was pretty empty.
I sat near the front on the window side. "Bit early for home time, isn't it sonny?" the driver said with a sly smile. "Oh.. I got suspended." I sigh. He laughed and asked me what for. I told him I got into some fights. Again he chuckled and muttered "Young wipper-snappers."
We 'small talked' after that. Then I reached my stop, hopped off and said goodbye.

I continued on my journey home. And when I got there, I sighed and let myself in. It was about 2ish now, I was hungry.
I was feeling lazy so I made myself a cup of soup. I drank it and moped around. I guess I don't have homework till I go to the new school.
I waited around till dad got home. Boy was he surprised when he found me home. "Can we go.. See her now?" i beg. He wouldn't answer me till I answered all his questions. "Why are you here so early?"."Sudpended?!?" "Why?!?" "Why we're you fighting?" "Pfft. He made you angry. Control your temper boy!" he argued.

He told me to get in the car. We had a fight all the way to the hospital. I was almost in tears.
-----Seeing mum-----
We pulled up outside the large white building.
We walked inside not saying a word. Dad signed us in. We were ushered by the nurse, even though dad already knew where we were going. We got to the room. I peeked in.
I couldn't bear it- the sight of it made me crack.

She was just laying there, limp, lifeless.
All these tubes sticking in and out of her. I just sat in a chair blubbering like an idiot. My dad was holding her hand. "Don't be such a baby Kyle." my dad spat.
I wiped my face, wiped away the tears that were only a tiny representation of the heartbreaking pain I felt on the inside.
I bent over my mother and kissed her on the cheek.
She had such an angelic face. I Tucked her soft, curly hair behind her ears.
"I love you mum." I breathed. "If only he knew.. The reason was you..he was taunting me.. Just because of the note dad wrote.. About seeing you tonight... I love you." i sighed sadly. I don't think dad heard.

Dad kissed her too. He just looked so broken. We drove home in silence. Except for the voices that crowded inside my head, echoing and echoing. "Why couldn't you be better?" "You're not good enough!" "No one loves you." "she won't survive." "Why would she want you?" "everyone hates you" "you're on your own" "no one cares". I knew these were lies, but they were so overwhelming.
Silent tears dripped down my face. Why can't anyone see this pain?

As soon as I was home I ran upstairs to my room.
I thought about Matt.
Oh Matt! He didn't know I had been suspended.
I checked my phone.
'3 messages from Matt. One missed call-Matt. '
I texted him.
"Hey, sorry. I got suspended. Wi t see you for a while. Catch up soon.
Things are very painful ATM. It's like 'walking on eggshells.' bye, Kyle." I pressed 'send'.

I tiptoed down to the kitchen to get a drink.
When I saw something flash. It was the reflection of a knife. ------

I stared at it.
Thoughts flashing in my mind. "Would anyone care?" I wondered.
I picked it up and ran to my room. I stated at it again. "would I?" I thought. I held it up to my chest. Hand shaking.

"No." I cried. "Not now."
I hid the knife. And lay on my bed crying.
I fell asleep and didn't wake till the next morning.

The days went past and nothing much happened.
More fight with Dad and Sam. More visits to mum.
Pain.Pain.Pain.

---Sunday night----
This was it. Tomorrow was the new school. I decided to give it ONE chance.
I made a deal with myself.
If there was something, anything good about that school, I'd let myself live. If there was one thing WORTH living for. If not? If the school just brought more pain? Then goodbye Kyle.