Daddy Dearest.

How could you miss that!
Not once or even twice.
You missed us growing up you stupid twat.
Your excuse the beer, cut price.

You missed Chris's football match,
He won by the way.
You missed the chicken pox me and Tallie did catch.
But of course you were busy that day.

Tallie got a scholarship did you even notice her go?
Mum cried with pride,
Tallie promised she'd be home for the snow,
While you say in front of the screen so wide.

When my turn came I left with a smile,
I'd worked hard to get into the Jockey Club,
After all I'd waited a while,
You migrated instead to a pub.

Chris became a cop,
It's his job to uphold the law
It's you he most wants to shop,
For using our mother as nothing but a mat for the door.

Your eldest daughter a fair lawyer.
Your youngest son a great detective,
Your middle daughter a professional Polo player,
Still our methods of ridding ourselves of you were quite effective.

The days we grew up she left and stood on her own two feet,
She doesn't love you anymore Daddy Dearest,
We last spoke to her while she was in Crete,
Isn't it sad that you don't have any dearest and nearest?

You failed as a father,
Of that you must always know,
Of you we shall never bother,
As you feel nothing but woe.