Today I found out why you have not been in touch
You are seriously ill and I didn't even know, this sucks
On top of fighting the cancer, the chemo and radiotherapy
The last time we spoke, your concerns were all about me
You said you felt guilty for not coming up at all
But you were feeling better and that is why you called
You said given time you'd drive up in your car
I said only do so when you're ready, don't want you driving far
We talked a short while, you made some silly jokes
Thinking of that now brings a big lump to my throat
That was about 3 months ago I knew all wasn't right
To just show up at your home, this thought I had to fight
Then a while ago I'd written an Opuss about you dad
What happened next may make you think I'm mad
I was upstairs and thoughts of you swirled around my head
Then I thought I'd better turn the telly off before I go to bed
I walked down the stairs literally opened the door
The telly switched off by itself...my jaw hit the floor
I was so spooked I went to get my son to come and take a look
He could tell I was terrified, my face read like a book
It was then I knew within that something was very wrong
That dreaded sense of bad foreboding was just too very strong
I was too scared to phone your former work partner, whether he had heard anything at all
I just kept praying and hoping that one week, from you I'd get my call
I did consider writing you a letter, pleading and begging your dear wife
Whether I could see you, not to cause pain, upset or strife
Then I thought you won't need all that added worry and stress
I felt in limbo...what can I do?...it's all just one big mess
Then I asked my brother if he would mind calling your old workmate
For news of you, a long time I had to wait
Then this morning I finally get the news of just how ill you've been
You were even in the hospital for 8 days, it's like I'm in a bad dream
You are apparently home now, doing better than you was
But you won't ever be better again...no reason...just because
The cancer you are trying so very hard to fight
Has you in a vice, you are trying with all your might
So I'm no closer to seeing you or speaking with you for a chat
I suppose I need to toughen up and face the very real fact
That I will never see or hear from you again...it's over...that is that
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