Life & Death

@yummybunny

Unicorns!

I'm Mr unicorn and I need needles to put me to sleep!!. I am an idiot.. YAY. I can can turn into 2 other things, I can turn into a raindrop. I'm now a raindrop. And I'm a Stegasauros!!!!.

@Yassy75

Oz

Oz is a black cat who belongs to my nextdoor neighbour. I was playing with him and he is sooooo funny. When I wriggle his toy in the bush he leaps into the bush and searches for it.

@Isadora

A Ginger Man

Once upon a time there was a man with ginger hair. He had no eyes nor ears. They said he had ginger hair so to speak. He could not talk as he had no mouth; he could not smell as he had no nose.

@Bilaterus

The Coldness

From the comfort of your bed, to the furriness of your slippers, shuffling along the carpet and gently opening the toilet door. But when you sit on the freezing seat, you shout in your mind "Shit!".

@ty-213

Never Go Shopping Without Headphones

One day, a girl went into a music shop. A Justin Beiber song was playing and it caused her ears to shrivel up and fall off. Moral of the story children- never go shopping without headphones..

@darraghoco

Brocabulary

My name is Broseph. My broffesion is a broffesional bro karter. Ive formed a bro-alition with brosaphine. Thank you for listening bros..

@darraghoco

How I met your mother is modern f.r.i.e.n.d.s!.

@Zorua101

Texas Jail

A woman in Texas bought a car and wanted to check the size of the boot, so she asked her family to lock her inside it. After the boot was closed the woman realised she was still holding the keys.