Two Years II

16th October 2006 06:34am

He told me my dreams were filled with darkness. That it didn't matter if we would make it through the night, as long as we had eachother for the time he had on this earth nothing else mattered. His eyes turned white in the bright lights. His body cold and pale. I had said my goodbyes although truly in my heart, he would never be a goodbye away. I just hope that the sunlight rises through the dark, and now he's gone- we won't feel the pain that I do. But I breathed him in. Every last part of him. Just the essence of his remaining soul now belonged to me.

I lumbered out of the hospital. Legs like weights and my heart falling out of my body. I entered the world; without Danny.
The air felt as though the oxygen had evaporated, the atmosphere was thick with rage. I was full of rage yet my body was so weak I could barely be move. The walk to my car seemed as though I'd walked for miles. I shut myself in, put the keys in and started to drive out of the hospital car park. There was light sneaking through the mist. Dawn breaking. I drove for an hour. Not even focusing on a route, but I eventually found myself at our apartment. It was like I was in a coma, not even realising what was going on. I entered our hallway. It smelt of him. Cool water by Hasslehoff. Without changing my clothes I climbed into bed, lay my head on the pillow and sobbed. Feeling the empty space beside me. The emptiness I now owned.