Even though this is not my diary, just like twitter an facebook aren't, It still makes me feel better to post what I feel an get it out of my system some way. I get annoyed of all people and I don't allow myself to get to close to people because all that has ever brought me is pain. So in that I've never had a best friend or someone to share secrets with. I just want someone to talk to and for them to understand me and why I do and act the way I do. It hurts when I have a close ish friend and they're the Closest thing I have to a best fiend but I'm still their 3rd choice. The only person I can consider my best friend would be my cousin and he's 5 states away... Sometimes I hate it at home because my parents expect so much from me. My oldest sister has issues that ultimately caused me to have issues. Trust issues. I also developed high anxiety and stress related issues. I know no one cares about this and that there is utterly no point in posting this, but it helps me feel a but better. No one knows I feel this way because I've become that damn good at hiding it. I should go into acting, but instead I want to be a detective to help people. Ironic... No one has ever offered to help me or go out of their way to make me happy like I do for people at least 3 times or more a day... Which is why I don't understand why everyone treats me like their 3rd option. I really believe people suck. We all just suck.