Desperate House Pets

@lsquidia

Lol i m speekn n txt lnguge. Its reely anoyn hw u actuly cnt rd mst of t wrds. I ht it when peepl actuly say lol. It mks me rofl nd lmao. Actuly al thse xprsons r vry ovrxagrtd wen ur nt me.

@OliverRiley

A Slapstick Story

My story is twenty thousand words long sp if you wish to read it please e mail my address. It would really mean the world to me. It is extremely popular with my year ten English class and features...

@Will10203

Ouch

By Will -------------------- Ouch o were is my arm o hello python what why is my arm in your mouth o I can tickle you because I can move my fingers.

@bowlch

The Exchange Student

The friend’s family is entertaining an exchange student. Exchange student arrives at the house where the family has prepared a lovely lunch out on the patio.

@bowlch

After A Night On The Ale

The morning after a heavy night on the ale I was in the shower, hung over and generally not feeling too pleasant.

@bowlch

The Good Neighbour

Friend has a dog that jumps into nextdoor’s garden. Tears up garden, flower beds etc and then appears with a dead bunny in its mouth. Friend panics.

@bowlch

The Train Journey

Bloke not feeling well, rushing for his train. Has attack of the shits and craps himself. Buys a new pair of trousers from shop in the station.

@GobzMH

Safe Spider

Every morning when I went into my bathroom there was a small spider I'm my bath and no I didn't scream like a little girl every time, well I thought it was just normal but then on Sunday I decided to...