"Guess"

@esmebutcherd

Speed Limit Of Sex

What's the speed limit of sex. 69, because once you reach that you have to turn back around!.

@keithheavey

BMW Joke

What's the difference between a rose-bush and a man driving a BMW. On a rose bush the prick is on the outside..

@CurtisJYoung

Marmite

People say I'm like marmite, not because they either love me or hate me, its because I smell like yeast..

@WizardKeville

Girls

Girls are like condoms, they spend more time in your wallet than on your dick.

@monkeyfunk

3 Nuns

One day three nuns where summoned into the office. The mother nun said "we found a pair of knickers in the fathers room". Two of the nuns gasped... The third giggled. "we also found a used condom".

@Dino_Dung

On my travels in the amazon, I saved a mysterious man from a tribe. He granted me one wish, but it had to be either a massive penis or unlimited memory... I forget what happened after that....

@jamieG

Tight Underwear

A smile is like tight underwear - it makes your cheeks go up..

@lukebrad1

Lost My Cock

I lost my arm in the army i lost my leg in the navi. I lost my cock in a butchers shop and found it in my gravy :).