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Friends.??

sammielee46 • 469 followers

You say you're my friend,
But the words just about where that ends,

I give you my attention and time,
To sit and listen to you moan and whine,

But when it comes to me,
You don't listen in reality,

I always make the effort to meet,
Otherwise I'd wait weeks for you to greet,

When I see you, you just sit on your phone,
I think that's rude but I don't like to moan,

Don't I deserve some effort and time of yours,
Instead when it comes to me all I see is shut doors,

One sided I give you take,
Maybe this friendship is a mistake?

Sorry guys little bit of a rant ish. I have two friends in particular that I'm referring two, and I've always viewed them as my best friends. I'm not one that has hundreds of friends, I have a select few. I'd rather have a couple of fab ones rather than loads of shitty ones. That's just my opinion though. Now I'm well aware of the fact that not everybody is like me. I don't expect much from people,
One of these is honesty - if I ask an honest opinion, please give me one, not the sugar coated version either. Yes be diplomatic if you please but be bloody honest. So if you can't be bothered to chat tell me that, I don't offend easily that often and would prefer the truth over a lie any day,
Don't be rude, manners are key! If you are having a deep and meaningful with someone I find it slightly rude that their attention is on their mobile, not on the subject at hand, it gives me the impression that you aren't actually listening,
And finally be yourself, not someone fake, if you are yourself ill love you for who you are, we all have faults and I find that an endearing personality trait, if you've done wrong hold your hands up.

Maybe I'm asking too much from people I dunno.
But just recently I've been reflecting on life in general and the people within my life and I've realised that if I didn't touch base with said friends they probably wouldn't touch base with me. I'm their shoulder to cry on, and I'm happy to do so, anytime, but when I'm in need of advice or an ear, where are they? Either nowhere to be seen or while I'm talking to them they're bloody fixated with their mobiles. I'd like to think I'm not selfish, and I do quite regularly put the needs of others before my needs. Ill drop anything to help within reason and I'm happy to do so. So why do I feel as though its not reciprocated. It's not about counting the things I do and the things they don't because seriously I'm not like that but sometimes I need someone too.
Everyone sees me as good ol Sam who'd do anything for anyone and consequently I find myself getting used for that. But surely if they were my true friends they'd see I'm struggling and for once just be there for me. I'm not asking for money or anything like that, just a message to see how I'm doing and someone who actually listens? Maybe I'm just not worth that to them. I honestly don't know. I've had these friends for years and didn't actually look at it like this until my husband actually pointed it out. He said I burn myself out helping them but when their life's going great I'm not even on their radar. And after sitting and thinking about it I think he's right.
I've been shown more kindness from people here than my friends recently. There are a few of you especially that have been encouraging and helpful, and some even take the time out of their day to listen to me and reassure me also.
@sarahgamal thank you for listening to me ramble on, your encouragement and support,
@sjw thank you for your encouragement and help when I've asked you,
@Burrfoot thank you for your encouragement and kind words relating to a post on my Grandads cancer,
@leelee101 thank you for your encouragement and kind words,
@yikici you too have given me encouragement and kind words,
@RichWithey thanks for your encouragement, kind words, and for being a website whizz taking time to help me on the website for #disabilityaware
@BethyBoo thank you for encouragement and kind words too,
@patdolan83 thank you for your encouragement and kindness too.
You all are bloody lovely and I'd like to think of you all as my long distance friends, I appreciate all of you, and I say that from the bottom of my not so healthy heart :)
Thank you to all of you for your kindness and help. Thank you to Opuss for creating such a wonderful community. I'm sure I've missed a few people but this is a global thanks to anyone else that's helped me too!
Sorry this probably looks like a load of Mumbo jumbo but I feel better now :)