With no sleep at all, head on fire, and a feeling of utter helplessness she decided she couldn't go to work. She'd never missed a day of work in her life. So reluctantly she made that phone call. She cursed herself for sounding so pathetic. " I'm sorry Sam, I feel just awful. I think it's just s head cold, but I haven't slept all night. I should be ok by tomorrow".
She knew Sam would understand, she was her right hand man after all. But still she felt guilty as she knew, Sam was being buried under the bureaucracy of being a head teacher.
"no problem, just get tested and get yourself well. I need you here"
Alex had left some toast by her bed, and a cup of tea. She couldn't face them, she tried the toast but she couldn't taste anything. What's happening to me she thought. Her eyes were hanging. Despite the persistent coughing, she collapsed into her pillow at last enveloped by sleep.
She didn't know how long she'd been out but instead of waking refreshed, she felt worse. The low winter light in the room stung her eyes and the pressure in her head was immense. Then, the coughing started again. Sips of water that's all she could manage to keep the irritation at bay.
Thankfully, Alex had managed to get josh off to school and wouldn't be back in time to pick him up. So she had arranged for a neighbour to bring him home.
The afternoon passed with the same relentless coughing, but she couldn't taste anything the thought of food horrified her. Three thirty came, and she heard the welcome sound of Josh coming through the front door. He was very independent for his age so was quite capable of sorting himself out. He got himself a snack then went upstairs to sit by her bed.
"Do you feel better now, mummy? When are you going to come downstairs?"
A lump grow in her throat and she struggled back the tears, but she told him a lie, a white lie, a needed lie, that she felt much better but still felt a little weak so would try and come down later for dinner.
He sat with her until Alex came home an hour later, talking about school the best she could.
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