Babysitting

@RemusLupin

Cats Eat Paper

Mr. P: Becky, where's your homework. Becky: I did it. Mr. P: Well where is it. Becky: My cat ate it. Mr. P: uh-huh. *writes 0 in grade book* Becky: MR. PALAZZO I DID MY HOMEWORK. MY CAT EATS...

@mAngel

Why My Family Is A Real- Live Sitcom: Part 3

**me in bed; not asleep yet** **sister in bed; not asleep yet** **cat asleep in chair** **Mom enters** Mom: Good night. (Kisses cat. Ignores humans in room. Walks out.) Me: .....

@cajunmustang808

Life of Serena Abrams

Today has GOT to be the worst day of my life. Paisley Just is the popular girl. And so far, SHE'S JUST EMBARRASSED ME IN FRONT OF ALL WEST VALLEY HIGH. I can't believe her.

@loobustus

The lonely piazza One day their was two pieces of piazza in a box one salami, one plain. The. Plain one said " I'm just a plain piece of pizza and your so lucky your a salami piazza.

@taffy01

Spanish

Your sitting in spanish and the spanish teacher starts talking really fast. Then she looks at you. And your like....what?.

@arielhoneybee

International House Of Oothapam

So far, my first day of class was an eye-opener. It was disappointing that I was the only one "dressed" for the occasion. I had a classmate named Tolstoy.

@arielhoneybee

The Campus Of Blinding Lights

I thought that the anticipation for the results of our first internal exam would be palpable. I had visions of our daily routine being replaced by tense apprehension.

@thehacksaw

Geek Romantic

Your eyes shine bright as a full page Flash takeover. A thousand onclick listeners respond to your quietest whisper.