She Was Just A Girl

He kissed her by the pond. He pointed out all the seaweed and told her that it was as thick as a rope. They made it into a swing. He pushed her back and forth on it as she laughed. He hummed an unfamiliar song to her as she stared into the sun, happy. She was just a girl. She didn't know why he was into her. She didn't like the fact that he had all this control over her. He could affect her mood so easily. So she ran from the boy she loved before he could break her heart. She was just a girl. She had a fear of being alone with a group of strangers. She wished she didn't have to look in the mirror, but always did. She ate when she was hungry and when she was bored. She loved being texted and was a quick replier. She wrote stories and poems to get out of her head. She was smarter than everyone else it seemed. She was one of the few people who got it in the world. She knew what it was all about. She knew too much. She was just a girl. It was the things in her head that led her to it. She was always thinking and thinking. The voices would become individuals, someone else was living in her mind. They told her to do things for adrenaline rushes. Jump in front of the traffic and back or her neighbor would get really sick. She knew it wasn't true, but thought it couldn't hurt. Slowly, she didn't know what was true and what wasn't. She could only tell two things apart, happiness and breathing. While she was breathing she could never be happy. She was only happy under the water; swimming, floating, letting herself sink and float back up, to see the sun shine through the water, to feel weightless. She loved the water. She went to the pond where they made the swing. She sat on the swing and rocked back and forth. The sun was blinding and she couldn't look into it. Her eyes had aged in her 15 years. Her eyes had seen too much and couldn't handle the sun anymore. She jumped in the pond. A cold chill covered her entire body. Goosebumps everywhere. She let herself sink to the bottom of the pond. She could see the sun from here. Around her were millions of vines made from the seaweed that he said was strong as a rope. She tied herself amongst the ropes and let out her breath. She stared into the sun through the water smiling before she took her last breath of air.