Online Friendship Blog 4

I'm just racking em up, guys! Chatting up five guys now!

It's crazy I need like a secretary to keep track haha

But on a serious note...

For awhile I was unsure what I was doing talking to all these guys. I felt like cheap shit.

I still feel like cheap shit.

Well I was texting the 19 year old Puerto Rican, the guy I like the most, thinking that he was nice and all but unsure if he even liked me, and then he randomly goes: when are you going to sleep Victoria?

And I was like: idk. I hate sleeping but I need to sleep so prob at some point

And he goes: because I was wondering if you would like to watch a movie with me tonight.

The whole time that we have been talking...which has been about a week now...well there's been no flirting really. No wait, there's been no flirting at all.

So I decided to be all bold and courageous and I'm all: I wish I was with you so we can watch it together and cuddle.

Being bold pays off sometimes.

So then he says: one day!

I was thinking: hell no.

Do all guys talk about "one day"???? AKA the day that never comes. There's a yesterday and a tomorrow but "one day" doesn't have a definite time for it to happen.

So then I'm bold again and I point out the distance, which is about 40 minutes. Not very far but still, it's a trip.

I suppose when guys buy the "one day" phrase, they get the "if there's a will, there's a way!" phrase as well. It must be a package deal.

So he texts: I'm willing to make things work.

Ha!

I texted my Mexican friend who was all: give it a shot, he's not whatshisface!

So I did. But I had to tell the 19 year old that I was a junior in high school. Which entails that I'm young 17. He knows I'm 17. He didn't know that I don't turn 18 until November though.

I was nervous to tell him because being a young 17 also means that I'm younger than his younger sister.

He didn't mind though. And then he started to spew possible bullshit which included "you're not the only one that's scared, I am too. I'm scared that you won't like me, that you'll stop talking to me..."

We haven't even been talking that long...maybe he got ensnared in my magical awesome powers that make people go crazy for me?

Lol

But the same "head over heels" talk that the 19 year old was doing happened with Marek, and once Marek was given some space, things ended. I don't want that to happen again.

The 19 year old and I talked till 2am instead of watching the movie. We have yet to call each other though. But anyway, he was saying that he'd like to formally go on a date with me. I'm terrified by that idea since I'm shy but we'll see.

Neither of us has been on a real date before, although he said he had a girlfriend for two years.

It's funny though...just a few hours ago I was pondering the concept of long distance and love and falling in love and Marek and then...here I am. I'm talking to a guy that likes me thus far. I'm trying out the long distance thing again. I'm putting myself in a position to fall in love again.

Do I like him?

I don't know. He's sweet but I refuse to fall in love with texts. I want to talk on the phone with him. I want to then meet him if the calling thing works out. I definitely don't want to fall for him so easily and as crazily as the way it was with Marek. I want to learn from that experience. From that lovely and heart-wrenching experience.