Today I thought incontinance pants would be a really good idea
No longer would I be living in peeing myself fear
If they were discrete and tied above the knee
I could walk about peeing myself
with self satisfactory glee
I could look smugly at all the women who queue to go for a piss
Wearing my special pants, that's something I won't miss
Not only would they be functional
But they'd keep me nice and warm
I could empty them at the end of the day
Then into the sexies to perform
Wouldn't it be great to just walk about and pee
Safe and secure in the knowledge
Your pants could hold your wee
Just imagine walking, talking and peeing at the same time
They'd be very hush hush so you wouldn't be charged with a fashion crime
You could even go dancing and strut your sexy stuff
But make sure you pack the sexies just in case you end up in the buff
But what if they spring a leak, just like those awful water beds
Now that would be a disaster, those legs would never get spread.
So men, spare a thought for us ladies
We can't just whip it out
Pee anywhere we want to
When we're out and about
*apologies to anyone who genuinely wears these.
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