As a cat it is also my born right to:
11: Sit on your bed and lick my fur shaking the bed violently while you sleep. (Please note I only do this as soon as the lights off and your settled.)
12: I will always walk on kitchen work tops and refere to rule 1. When you yell at me. I won't move till your a foot away.
13: Throwing up hairballs will always be on expensive rugs or carpets. I deserve the best. (Please also note I will walk backwards while doing this so that its human foot length.)
14: I will always seek the highest point in the house to observe you from. Even if I have to claw my way up the expensive wardrobes.
15: I am a god/godess. You are my servant. The dog is your bitch.
16: I will spend all day sleeping. I will wake up at night while you sleep. (I think it's rude when you ignore me during those hours I'm awake.)
17: I will do a cute thing but as soon as your camera comes out I will stop!
18: Chasing flys round the house. I will climb over anything to get it for you. Incliding expensive ornaments. Be greatful I disposed of the fly.
19: Occasionally I will test your love for me. I will hide somewhere warm and dark for hours watching you worry about me. This gives me pleasure!
20: If I fall or miss jump something I will automatically lick myself and look at you like you pushed me. Then refer to rule 1.
Want to join the conversation? Sign in to leave a comment.