"Be more like Lila. She's taller, slimmer, more confidence than you'll ever have." Hugo Oskar tells me.
Most agents support you, mine likes to bring me down.
"But-
"Shut-up Céline! No more buts."
And that was my first day of modelling. I was compared to my cousin sister, and trampled on.
But I liked it.
Weeks passed and I was feeling more and more anxious.
Not even 'Seventeen' magazine wanted me to be on their cover!
All of them wanted Lila.
And then I hit the wall.
I remembered what Hugo told me
"Lila is slimmer, be like her,"
After that thought, only craziness followed.
I stopped eating. When I felt like fainting I dipped a cotton ball in orange juice and ate that.
I injected myself with the hormone of a pregnant lady, just to burn more fat.
I started consuming hundreds of laxatives just to drop pounds.
I ran 5 hours a day. I became crazy!
Then I came to my lightest. 90 pounds.
And then finally I got it. A photo shoot for a famous magazine. I felt rewarded. I was finally getting what I wanted as a model!
The day before the shoot I went extreme. I didn't drink water. No food. Only exercise.
I upped my laxative intake to 100 pills. I knew I would look better maybe 5 pounds lighter. My mind only filled with thoughts of thinking i'm worthless. And to make myself feel better I would not eat.
And then I fell. Down to the floor. Dying.
My name is Céline Tash, and I died and anorexic.
Want to join the conversation? Sign in to leave a comment.