iTitanic

@Valkyrie

I hate it when people text me "K". I'm rarely in the mood to talk about Potassium....

@Stenataar

Windows 8

"Failure is not an option" It's already installed with Windows 8.

@09jnewington

Born And Die A Gamer

When I die, I'm going to have the Tetris theme played at my funeral, just as my coffin is being lowered into the ground..

@09jnewington

Vampire Shame

I was so ashamed when I got bitten by a vampire. I couldn't even look at myself in the mirror..

@09jnewington

Supermarket Theif

I like to go to supermarkets and take things out of other people's carts for the fun of it. Yesterday I took a baby..

@Noonington

Geek jokes aren't funny?

I Zn not..

@itshalixx

Two guys came into a bar, the first guy says " I'll have some H2O" the second guy says: "I'll have some H2O too" so the other guy dies....

@09jnewington

Dodgy Hobby

“I love to go down to the schoolyard and watch all the little children jump up and down and run around yelling and screaming... They don't know I'm only using blanks.”.