Nicknames

Most people have a nickname
Though some are rather odd
There's Grunge, the Moose and Stumpy
Awe! Never mind (poor sod!)
We've Speedy, Flash and Turbo
Presumably they're quicker
One girlfriend called me Drambuie
Some fancy kind of liquor
(think about it)
But the one I'm stuck with nowadays is strange, as you will see
It's really quite ambiguous,
The initials M.O.G.
Not mog, as in moggy,
Although pussy comes to mind,
It's nowt to do with felines,
No, it's nothing of the kind.
So girls if you're frustrated at the ending of the day
Or feel a certain itching
reading 50 Shades Of Grey
Then come on down to see me
I'll fulfil your every need
Coz M.O.G. means simply
Multiple Orgasms Guaranteed.