The Bacon Tree

Two Mexicans have been lost in the desert for days. Crawling on their hands and knees and at death's door, they see a tree in the distance. As they drag themselves nearer, they see that it's draped with rasher upon rasher of bacon: smoked bacon; crispy bacon; life-giving, nearly raw, juicy bacon… all sorts of bacon.
"Hey, Pepe," says P...edro, "look! Ees a bacon tree! We're saved!"Pepe says, "I never heard of no bacon tree amigo, maybe ees a mirage?"
Pedro says, "Well eet sure looks like ees a bacon tree. You wait here, I'll check eet out."
With that, Pedro crawls on ahead, closer to the tree. It takes some time and, as he gets to within five feet of the bacon tree, he's suddenly gunned down in a hail of bullets without warning. Blood splatters the sand. Pepe drops down behind a dune and calls across to the dying Pedro, "Pedro! Pedro! Que pasa hombre?"
With his last breath, Pedro calls out, "Ugh, run, amigo, run for your life, ees no a bacon tree ...

... ees a HAM BUSH!"