Petrol Pumps And Penises

[explicit content. Contains references to penises. And petrol pumps]

Petrol pumps and penises,
Are in many ways alike,
But before you start to hump, my friend,
Make sure you've got it right,

One is mostly hard,
And the other mostly floppy,
One squirts with precision,
And the other's slightly sloppy,

One ends with a nozzle,
And the other with a bell,
But you cannot get them mixed, my friend,
I'll teach you how to tell,

You see one dangles long and rubbery,
Actually the other does the same...
But one you can control,
And the other's hard to tame,

One produces liquid,
That can have a yellowish hue,
Hmm but the other also does this,
There's no difference between the two,

Well one you have to squeeze,
To get anything to come out,
Whilst the other is quite similar,
But with more jiggling about,

I'm getting quite confused right now,
Telling one pump from the other,
Was it penises that have the handle?
I'll have to ask my mother,

Anyway,
I hope that you have learnt from this,
And taken my advice,
'Cos the less you know the differences,
The more you'll pay the price,

I'm sure you have no questions,
I've explained it well, I know,
But time has got the better of me,
And I've really got to go,

Before I part, the moral,
Or conclusion, if you will,
Is don't drink cum from a petrol pump,
It'll leave you feeling ill.