Man Jokes

I know these jokes are old but I found them funny.

1, Women will never be equal to man unless they can walk down the road bald and with a beer gut and still think they are sexy

2, How can you tell
your man is happy?

Who cares.

3, What does it mean when a man is in your bed, gasping and calling your name out?

You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.

4, Why are men are like laxatives?

They irritate the shit out of you.

5, What did god say after creating Adam?

I can do so much better.

6, Why can't men get mad cows disease?

Because there all pigs.

7, How many men does it take to put the toilet seat down,

Nobody knows because it hasn't happen yet.

8, Why does the female widow spider eat the male after mating?

To stop the snoring from
starting

9, Women might be able to fake an orgasm but men can fake the whole relationship.

10, Never hit a man with glasses,
use a baseball bat instead.

11, Do you talk to your husband during sex?

Only if he phones me.

12, Has your husband been circumcised?

No, he is a complete dick.