This is a joke that my friend told me earlier today. I warn you, it contains a few swears.

Johnny and his dad were walking home from his school when they saw two women arguing in the street. The first of the women screamed, "Bitch!" and slapped the other round the face. The second shouted, "Hag!" and slapped the first back. Johnny then asked his dad, "Daddy, what's a bitch and what's a hag?" His father said to him, "Oh, they're just other names for women," and hurried Johnny home before he could hear anymore of the women's argument.

Later on, Johnny was watching his dad shave his chin, when the razor slipped and cut his chin.
"Shit!" he exclaimed.
"Daddy, what does shit mean?" Johnny asked. His dad quickly replied, "It's just another word for shaving," and said no more.

Later on, Johnny was watching his mum cook a turkey in the kitchen. As she was pulling it out of the oven, she burnt her finger on the tray and shouted, "Fuck!"
"Mummy, what does fuck mean?" Johnny asked. Embarrassed, his mum said to him, "it's just another word for cooking, honey," and went back to what she was doing.

Just then, two ladies knocked on the door and Johnny answered. Before they could say anything, Johnny blurted out, "Hello, bitches and hags! If you're looking for my dad, he's upstairs, shitting himself and my mum's in the kitchen fucking a turkey."