Billy: "Hey, what's this I hear about them finding the bones of an old English king under some car-park?"
Jimmy: "Yeah, that's right! Apparently it's 'Dick the Shit'."
Billy: "What do ya mean 'Dick the Shit' !" There's never been an English king called 'Dick the Shit' !"
Jimmy: "Well, that's what Paddy told me."
Paddy: "No Oi didn't! Oi said 'Richard the Turd' !"
(Ah, the old ones are the best ones!)
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Yeah, but innit though....
A chicken gets invited to a real fancy dinner party. He dresses up smart in hopes of fitting in and making new friends. Arriving fashionably late the chicken enters and looks around.
An elderly lady took 2 stuffed dogs to the Antiques Roadshow....
I feel I must apologise to sweet pussy Pauline I got the wrong idea and now I feel appalling.
1. Two blondes walk into a building..........you'd think at least one of them would have seen it. 2. Phone answering machine message - '...If you want to buy marijuana, press the hash key...' 3.
A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood.
This is a joke that my friend told me earlier today. I warn you, it contains a few swears. Johnny and his dad were walking home from his school when they saw two women arguing in the street.
A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood.
A guy took his girlfriend to her first football game. Afterward he asked her how she liked the game. "I liked it, but I couldn't understand why they were killing each other for 25 cents," she said.
The old ones are def the best, a van overtook me last week and someone had written 'cleaned by Stevie Wonder, in the dirt😃😂 made me smile
@glen Ha ha! Poor old Stevie has more jokes about him than most. What goes " Click, click, click - is that it? Click, click, click - is that it?" - Stevie Wonder with a Rubik's Cube! Thanks for the repost mate. 😊👍🍺⚽
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