Shakespeare This Ain't !

@Eatonlynch

Fighting Over 25c

A guy took his girlfriend to her first football game. Afterward he asked her how she liked the game. "I liked it, but I couldn't understand why they were killing each other for 25 cents," she said.

@_manisha_

Rush Hour 3

Master Yu: May I help you . Detective James Carter: I'll be asking the questions old man. Who are you. Master Yu: Yu. Detective James Carter: No, not me. You. Master Yu: Yes, I'm Yu.

@Maunder

Fredrick

Julie was a schoolgirl. Fredrick; he was not. The day he went in the girl's loos, was the day that he forgot. The girls, they did not like it, They began to scream and shout.

@steely2302

Sperm Jar

An 85-year-old man was requested by his Doctor for a sperm count as part of his physical exam.

@gazplend

Easy Mistake?

I feel I must apologise to sweet pussy Pauline I got the wrong idea and now I feel appalling.

@ElishaWatts

Blonde Paint Job

A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood.

@Mattbreon

This is a joke that my friend told me earlier today. I warn you, it contains a few swears. Johnny and his dad were walking home from his school when they saw two women arguing in the street.

@TheCodsPollocks

That's A Fanny Piece Of Jewellery !

I was looking in a jeweller's shop window yesterday hoping to get some idea on what to get ' She Who Must Be Obeyed ' for Christmas when I had to look twice at a certain piece.