blingey123
Last night, I babysat for the children I babysit most frequently. So much so, that Paul knows what time they go to bed, and will call accordingly once they're asleep. So much so, that all the kids, aged ten, eight, six, and four, all knew h…
Freshman me, two years ago, looked over at Paul, who was sitting just a few feet away on the weight room floor. The previous day before I had noticed him, alone, not really sure who he could talk to. I knew what that felt like. And my heart…
He walked me to singing class. I was a little late, and he begged me to linger just a little bit more. I shook my head, smiling wistfully at him, and went into the classroom. Then, I remembered the day before. How Mr. Andrews let us loose b…
Paul was unhappy as I listened to more music with Jason. He sat on a chair, twiddling his thumbs. Then, suddenly, he jumped up and marched to stand next to me. Jason started waving his arms again, mimicking the drums and bass of the song p…
Two days ago in singing class, Mr. Andrews let us loose. He had to go work on some things having to do with the musical, so he allowed us to do whatever we wanted. I had brought a present my brother had gotten me to school, to use to work o…
For the past few days, Paul and I have kept at it. Play fighting, wrestling, grabbing. Sally likes to keep a good distance away, smirking at me. A couple of days ago, he and I were chatting on the phone, and we went on about how this one …
I felt myself being lifted in the air and laid on my back. "Lay flat," Paul ordered, grinning mischievously. He grabbed my ankles and made my legs flat. "What are you doing?" I asked. He chuckled. "Nurse!" He yelled at Sally. "Get the anes…
Paul did "flirtatious" things with both me and Sally the entire night, but the way he did them differed greatly. With Sally, the touching was playful and boyish, and sent jealous prickles through my heart. With me........... A song came on,…
His hand paused from where he had been petting Maddie's soft, black fur. "What?" He asked softly, pretending he hadn't heard me. I repositioned myself in the water uncomfortably. "Can you tell me what was wrong?" He turned back around, look…
As it turned out, Paul was able to go to Sally's. So as Sally and I sat on her bed, she laughed as I kept looking eagerly out the window to see if Paul had come yet. "Chillax, Em," she said, grinning. "He'll be here soon." And he soon came.…
That night, I did not sleep. All I could see was his face, his pained eyes, the hurt in those irises. The next day, I had to take the SAT, and I knew that Paul was there as well. We had both registered to take it on the same day at the same…
I am going to throw up. I am literally going to bend down and throw up. Paul and I were arguing. About all the usual stuff. He was very, very angry. He told me how he hated the fact that he was a criminal for not loving me back. That ever…
"Hey." I looked at the text from Paul. "Hey." We started talking. At first the conversation was casual. But then... "I know why you were mad" he said. I opened my mouth. "It's because you thought I was flirting with Carrie". I closed it. "…
Back on the couch, I sat, next to Paul. There came a time where my leg was literally over his, our ankles twisted together. It was something *so* hard to miss, yet he looked like he didn't even notice. Or if he did, it looked like he didn't…
Paul kept drawing people and I kept cutting them out. It was fun, but so childish. I had to keep reminding myself he was a five year old in a sixteen year old's body. Soon, we were giggling again, him and I. I guess I couldn't enjoy making …
"Em, choose a color for your eyes," Paul said. I sighed. "Hang on a second." I finished the round with a shriek and a laugh, looking at Sally. Then, I turned around, making my face go blank. I could feel his eyes on me. I didn't care. In th…
Sally and I stayed there for a good ten minutes, before we gave in to Paul's begging. A little bit of pleasure came from making him upset. I noticed it, and knew it was wrong. But he was hurting me so much. And I wanted to make him upset, t…
Sally came in and hugged me tight. "What's going on?" She whispered. I told her about what Paul had done when she'd been in the kitchen. She stared at me, shaking her head. "He's being a jerk, Em," she said. "I want to slap him." Carrie and…
We hung out yesterday. Me, him, Sally, Carrie, and later Heather, at Sally's mom's house. First, he and I played chess and he won after about seven minutes. Then, we all decided to play Mario Kart on the Wii. Sally's mom brought in snacks. …
Oh my gosh... ... I'm on the phone with Paul. He's been making snide comments about Tom lately, and he made another one under his breath. I asked him what he said, and he said "Nothing." Then, as a joke, I said, "He loves you." And then, i…
I got new glasses. They're glasses I'll wear when I don't feel like wearing contacts. I love them, and I wore them today, the first day after break, with my favorite fox sweater, jeans, and my cowboy boots (the ones Jason likes). Today, I s…
It's only been five days since Paul left for Canada, and I miss him. For two of those days, he didn't talk to me, but for three, we *did* talk. So I shouldn't miss him that much, but I do... Which is why, this morning, as I lay in bed readi…
Finally, we were off the phone. Immediately, he texted the group iMessage. I started speaking Dutch to him, insulting him. He spoke back. Sally had no idea what was going on. Then, he said, "Sally, let's Facetime." Another blow to my heart.…
I stared at my phone, which was buzzing once again with an incoming call. You can guess who it was. "Hey," I said, staring into space. "I married Carrie," was the first thing out of his mouth. I ignored him, twiddling around on my iPad. "I …
And then he comes along and makes you remember very, very vividly. I sat reading The Great Gatsby at the kitchen table after really only seeing Paul a few times that day. My phone started buzzing and I looked to see an incoming call from Pa…
I sat myself down in Algebra, the day after Valentine's Day, my heart still hurting, but my eyes dry. The girl that sits next to me turned and smiled. "Hey," I smiled back. "Did Aaron do anything for Valentine's?" Her smile grew bigger. "He…
That night, the night of the day dedicated to love, Paul and I had another conversation. That night, our relationship hit a very large speed bump. Or...so I thought then. I finally confronted him. About everything he'd been doing. Our Sims…
Still completely embarrassed, I grabbed Carrie, who held her bunch of roses dreamily in her arms. "Walk me to history?" I asked her. "Mmmmhm," she smiled, looking down at her roses that her boyfriend had given her. No sooner than when we ha…
Jason walked through the door, as calm and cool as ever, and I took a breath. I held a Hershey's chocolate kiss in my hands, and tossed it back and forth, one hand to the other. Mr. Andrews wasn't here today, so we had to direct ourselves…
I ate lunch with him and Heather. I tried not to look at him, but it was hard when all he did was talk to me. He smiled, laughed, scrunched his eyes shut and let his teeth curl back, and I almost had to just leave. It was hurting more and …
This morning, I woke up. And I took a breath. And I decided that I could do this. I could go to school, and put on a smile, and no one would know my pain. And then I could forget it, too, for a little bit. I could curl my hair, wear my pink…
Last night, I asked Paul what all the fuss during lunch was about. I asked him about telling me not to walk so close to him. He told me it was all a joke. Earlier in the year, when he'd found out about my feelings for him, he'd actually don…
I got back to my seat, and Tom came over. "Uh, what are you doing?" I asked, picking up my second music book and flipping to "Nelly Bly". "It's still mixed parts," he said. "And I thought I'd pop on over for a visit. Are you okay?" I presse…
I turned around and just decided to go a couple seats back to stand next to a friendly-looking bass. There was no way I was standing next to Jason. I took in a breath, glad I had found a place for myself. When I felt a hand lay on my should…
French class was difficult. Tom sat next to me, and kept poking me, begging me to know what was the matter. I just kept my head on my arms, closing my eyes, trying to keep in the tears. Why was Paul doing this? Why was he acting so...so... …
I was starting to feel a little bit better. I'd texted Heather and asked her if what Tom had said was true, but she hadn't replied. Even though it was bothering me, I was with a few of my friends, and was cheered up a bit by their funny ant…
As I stood with Heather, talking, I felt someone's hand run through my hair, and turned around. Paul stood, grinning at me. He did the same thing to Heather, who glared playfully at him. "Do *not* mess up my hair!" she cried. I smiled at P…
Last night, Paul wanted to talk on the phone, but I was watching the newest episode of Downton Abbey, my eyes glued to the screen. I told him so, and he was a bit annoyed. Then, he texted, "Just realized I can't call anyway, i have a chem …
I felt Jason's eyes on me during singing class today. Those green irises gazed up at me from where they had been previously scanning something on his phone. I felt them as I walked by him to talk to Carrie, and as I walked back to my seat. …
Confusion. The main thing I feel currently. Last night, after that last post beginning with "we talked", we talked a lot more. He asked me if I really thought for a second that he DIDN'T want me to have a class with him. He asked where the …
We talked. Apparently, it was a joke. I don't see how it was a joke. It was pretty believable to me. I think he just wishes it was a joke. I'm so confused. He asked me why, as happy as he makes me, he also makes me so angry. I told him tha…
I...just don't get it. Today I was texting Paul, Sally, and Heather in the group iMessage, talking about what classes we were taking next year. I told Paul that he and I *had* to have a class together, because Sally and Heather both had cla…
I got home, and, yes, we did call. But not before Sally and I had a bit of a conversation. "Paul: "Hey Em! *TACKLE*", Sally texted, and I giggled. " x 193838191847," I texted back. Sally: "LOLOLOLOL" Me: "LOLOLOLOL" Me: "Sally: *about to at…
There was literally ice stuck to my hair. Sally and I went into the bathroom, where I saw how Paul had seen me for the past couple of hours. Messy, snowy ponytail, bright pink cheeks, and absolutely no makeup. "Oh man," I whispered, staring…
I had great difficulty in getting my socks off. They were almost frozen to my feet. "We need to get you to the emergency room," Paul growled. "Paul, I'm fine," I laughed, wincing a bit as I tried to pry off one of my socks. "Aaaaaaaaah," I…
We walked to where an upside down pot sat on top of the snow. "There's one!" Paul cried, running over to it and lifting it up. A baby pine tree poked out of the snow. "It grew a little!" Paul announced excitedly. "It's so little," I cooed,…
Paul kept at it. Every time I got up he'd have his arm around me and we'd be tumbling into the snow. He got up, opening his arms. "How about a hug?" He asked innocently. Before I could even make up my mind, he had his arms around me. And th…
I was pretty tired from running in the snow. Paul thoroughly enjoyed messing with me, throwing snow at me and grabbing me and wrestling with me. I decided to retaliate, wrapping my arms around him and trying to pull him down to the ground l…
"Hey, look!" Paul pointed to a huge bush covered in snow. "Our hiding place!" He beckoned us to follow him, crawling into a hole in the bush. I crawled in after him, and Sally followed from behind. Inside was a fairly large, empty space, wi…
Ugh, okay, I tried. And I got a few points! And it was pretty intense! I did a lot of blocking and put up quite a fight! But in the end, Paul one the World Cup finals. Each time he'd get a goal he'd grin at me and I'd shake my head and grin…
We received 2 feet of snow at our town. It snowed from Thursday night all through Friday and a bit of Saturday. So. On Saturday afternoon, Paul invited me, Heather, and Sally to his house to frolic in the snow. Heather couldn't make it bec…
Expect a looooot of W...TIN posts tomorrow. Today, I went to Paul's house. And my heart is still racing.
Jenny edited her picture and made it black and white. Tell me if you want to see it in color. Aren't we cute together? ;]
Well... <3 Paul. Acted weird. And not the good way. I found myself feeling stupider and stupider each time I looked at him. He was keeping his distance, very much so, and it hurt a great deal. I don't know why one moment he was touching me …
Paul got his braces off. Just when I thought I couldn't think of him as anymore perfect, he now has a shining smile of perfect, straightened teeth. Oh, the cruelty. What was worse is that I spotted Jason with his on again off again girlfrie…
The story rages on! Yesterday morning I sat on the couch in my dad's office, when Paul sent a text to the group conversation with me, Heather, and Sally. It was a picture. I clicked on it and noticed a screenshot of his Sims game. It was a …
The rest of the night was just like that. Paul touching me, Paul taking my phone and kissing it, Paul doing flirty things and then realizing "we shouldn't do that" and then laughing. It was sending me spinning. All thoughts of Jason and Gig…
Paul had been poking me and getting close to me and touching me for a while, and it annoyed me. Because I was trying to get over him and when he did stuff like that I couldn't. Soon, we were play fighting again, and he had my arms in his ha…
Paul kept acting weird the entire night. I smirked up at Sally and at Heather, who was on FaceTime because she couldn't make it. "You guys wanna see how Jason put his arm around me?" I asked. Immediately, Paul's own arm was around my should…
And things got more and more twisted. Paul pulled out his iPad, unlocking it and going to Sims. "Oh no, not Sims," I moaned. We both had Sims on our iPads, but I never really play it anymore. We have all of our friends on it, and the people…
For the longest time I've been friends with this adorable guy that I met on the Internet. He's from Texas and has the same religious views that I do. We have a lot to talk about and not enough time to talk about it. So keep this in mind, as…
Still smiling over my victory of not messing everything with this guy up, I sang with utmost vigor whatever song Mr. Andrews wanted us to sing. We were an elite singing group, with a very large repertoire, and it was important to perfect ea…
"Was it a mistake?" I thought, staring at Jason's Facebook post that I'd just liked. I couldn't help it. He was such an amazing writer. It was impossible not to give him props for his inspiring posts. But my mind was torn. Would he be freak…
Why on earth was Paul here? He kept grinning, nodding at Jason and giving me this knowing look that made me nervous. Jason completely ignored him. We began walking towards the cubbies, him in front, me in back. "What period is it now?" He a…
I walked into the library for my free period, looking for any familiar face. Period one and three were my new frees, which was pretty different from last semester. I almost had to pinch myself when I noticed Jason standing near the cubbies…
Paul had me walk him to his art class again, waiting outside of my own singing class door. I was still giddy from Jason's unexpected hug, and excitedly retold the entire story. "Wow," Paul said, eyebrows raised. "I know!" I giggled, almost …
"Yeah," I sighed. "I'm super tired." I stifled a yawn as I kept talking to Jenny before singing class started. The door swung open, and I turned to see who it was. My heartbeat sped up just a bit when I saw Jason stroll through the door. I …
"OMG EM!!" Heather screamed through text. I was in a group iMessage with Sally, Paul, and Heather, telling them about the things going on with Jason. "He's soooo cute" I texted, smiling slightly. Paul had yet to reply. "I bet, u guys sound …
And things kept getting weirder with Jason. I thought it was just a one time thing...but a few days after our conversation, I realized this could be solid. After we'd finished our songs, I saw him crane his neck over the crowd of singers. W…
"Why is he doing this?" I thought, staring at the guy in front of me. "He...doesn't like me...does he?" My thoughts of Paul had immediately been interrupted as, so randomly enough, perhaps the most attractive and most flirted-with guy in my…
Oh, Sandy Hook... Dear Sandy Hook. What have you to say? Do you cry... Do you cry? For the children yesterday? My Sandy Hook... Poor Sandy Hook... I ask you, please don't cry. Even though your prized possessions Yesterday did die. Please, S…
You think you're so darn clever, You think, "She's met her match". You think you've fin'lly shut me out, And secured the sturdy latch. You think you're such a victim, You think you're so oppressed, When you're the one that's stabbing me, Bo…
A girl is glaring at her closed bedroom door like she's hoping it'll burst into flames. "It's not fair," she thinks, fingers curling into fists. "Why won't she let me be with him?" The girl keeps glaring, face red, teeth grit, eyes fierce. …
hopeful so hopeful that this was for the best hopeful so hopeful that my mind will be at rest hopeful so hopeful that though I feel such pain, I'm hopeful so hopeful I can be happy again.
broken so broken such pain do I feel broken so broken it won't ever heal broken so broken my life is a blur broken so broken cannot find a cure broken so broken my tears never cease broken so broken all I want is some peace broken so broken…
If you're having some trouble finding, What some call, "a cloud's silver lining" Remember that it, Could be a millimeter thick... Just a millimeter. And it will be shining. And if you still cannot find it, Look over the cloud, under, behin…
Look, I'm not saying I disrespect Atheists or Agnostics or anything like that. But something is stirring inside of me, and it's something my brain and my heart are telling me to share. I've seen my fill of the battle of God vs. science. I'v…
~*~ I talked to you today, Didn't think you were impressed... With how I did my makeup Or the way that I was dressed. I laughed with you tonight, And you smiled, ear to ear. And while in your presence, I forgot every fear. You texted me la…
He's tall and he's skinny, With bright blue eyes. And he's always there When I need a good cry. His arms are the best place To go when I'm weary, Of the world around me. The days that are dreary. He calls me to wake up, And calls to say goo…
On a kitchen table, Far, far away... There's a land, delicious. Made of food, they say. With a pancake sun, And powdered sugar snow. That falls down gently On Breakfast Land below. Strawberry stop signs, Sausage link posts. Cozy little hous…
~*~ We talked a little last night, Much to my content. Yeah, you were pretty talkative. Lots of texts were sent. So today I decided to text you. "omg, like hey." But you did not reply. Not one text, all the day. I told myself to not get sa…
1. New symbol on my pieces: ~*~ means that the piece is about my personal life, if not already stated. Things like MWH are true, because at the very beginning, I say they're all real. But as for other pieces, it is not specified. I just tho…
~*~ It's not like you're a stranger. We're friends, pretty good! But when I saw you, there, today... I got a change of mood! Dressed in a crisp, grey suit. Neck wrapped in a pink silk tie. I couldn't help but, shamefully, Let out a dreamy …
Yesterday, Carrie had texted me the last picture they had taken of me in my grassy gown. I had to do a double take. "Whoa," I whispered. I had one milky hand on my reddish blonde hair. The other was gracefully outstretched. My bright blue e…
I was speechless. Absolutely speechless at the picture that stood before me on my computer screen. I was in my grass dress, looking off into the sky. My arms were gracefully lifted up towards the sun. My pale skin glowed. "This can't be me,…
"Em." Paul texted later. "You have to see these pictures. They're amazing." "Oh." I texted back. "Let me see." Paul sent me one. It was the picture of me looking up. It was just my eyes, peeking from the grass. I gasped. "Not to be weird or…
I lifted my back from the dirt, pulling my arms free of the grass's green grip. Paul's eyes widened. "Someone take pictures!" he yelled. I watched, confused, as Carrie scrambled for her cell phone camera. "The sun is hitting you *perfectl…
Me and the girls were swinging when Paul got up and laid on the grass. "Hey!" I called out. "What are you doing?" "Relaxing," he called back, closing his eyes. I jumped off my swing and went over to him, laying down next to him. Disgusted, …
~*~ True story. <3 "Did we lose them?" I turned my head over my shoulder, anxiously tucking a strand of my long hair over my ear. Paul looked behind him, his fists curled together. "I guess," he sighed, taking a moment to catch his breat…
~*~ What is this little theory This stupid idea of yours? "You need a break. I need a break." Right. That's true. Of course. There's an actual reason. One you cannot say. And you can try, Yes you can try. To cover it in every way. But we b…
I accidentally reposted an opuss post for a more mature audience but I didn't mean to! I am not the type of person that indulges in any of that kind of thing...don't read it please, it showed up in my feed because someone I follow reposted …
~*~ Do you not know That you're tearing me apart? That you're ripping to shreds Both my mind and my heart? I feel like crying almost every day From the things that you do. And the words that you say. You play all these games Treat me like …
Warning: Do not read this unless you have read the 22 other parts! <3 "My beautiful Tasha," Marcus touches her cheek. "You are so perfect. So gentle and meek. I love you so much, With all of my heart. But the time is coming. We will soon h…
~*~ Have you ever felt a sudden surge of hatred for the person you love? When you're suddenly so angry by the power they have over you? When you want to deny that just their name makes your cheeks flush? When you're so annoyed that just a …
"M-Marcus," she whispers. "You...you are here." "Of course," he said softly. "I won't leave you, dear." And Tasha starts crying, For the tenth time that week. 'Til a bloodied hand comes And touches her cheek. "Stop it, my lovely. I hate whe…
~*~ What more can I say. I'm at it again. He's so beautiful. He's so perfect. And I've fallen. For someone who, according to society, would be completely below me. He is the exact thing society screams to avoid: shy, socially awkward, not …
That night, Paul begged for me to tell him everything. Everything I wrote here. Finally, he said something like this: "you are a pretty, intelligent, wonderful, absolutely insane girl whose friends love hanging out with her you need to unde…
His mouth gaped, eyes widened. I looked away again. Heather was mortified. He still held my wrist, tight. He wouldn't let go. The harder I pulled, the tighter his grasp. He kept looking at my cuts, eyes blank, mouth open. I immediately felt…
Sally went home. It was just me, Paul, and Heather. We sat outside Dunkin Donuts in the pouring rain, relaxing. The little stuffed horse that Sally had won for me at a prize claw game was trapped in Paul's relentless grip. I reached forward…
I changed my band aids and went to my World Studies final the next day. I wore a long sleeved blue shirt that hid my wrist perfectly. My dad eyed my left arm suspiciously. As soon as I was home, and I was sat down watching TV, he asked me w…
"Sh-shaving," I blurted, dipping my piece of flour covered chicken into the egg wash. "On...your arm?" My mom asked. "Uh...I wasn't paying attention...I um...shaved my wrist instead of my legs..." "That sounds a little weird," she said soft…
She grabbed my phone and opened up my texts. I just let her. I couldn't move. Couldn't speak. By the way her eyes burned with flaming anger, I knew she had just read Paul calling me an attention whore. She grabbed my arm. "Come on," she or…
I froze. She looked at me with her big, blue eyes. I couldn't look back. I couldn't look at anyone. I got dizzy. "Uh," I said softly. I waited for a lie to spring from my throat. Anything. She waited, too. "Uh," I whispered, my cheeks getti…
I woke up. My depressed state was gone. I felt refreshed and ready for my Chorus and French finals. I lifted up my hand. And my mouth dropped open. Dozens of cuts riddled my left wrist. And the memories of last night came rushing back. "Oh …
After a moment, Paul typed: "EMILY YOU ARE THE BIGGEST FREAKING ATTENTION WHORE I'VE EVER KNOWN STOP PLAYING THESE FREAKING STUPID GAMES OMG GUYS IM SCRATCHING MY WRISTS BECAUSE IM SO GOTH FEEL SORRY FOR ME WELL YOU KNOW WHAT" I didn't read…
"That's nice." I stared at the tiny scratch I'd made on my left wrist. "Again," the voice of my depressed side urged. "Again." Scratch. "Again." Scratch. "Paul," I typed. "I'm not cutting. I'm just doing light scratching." "UM DON'T STOP TH…
"You are an ugly, worthless, piece of nothing." I closed my eyes and tried to fight it. The thoughts pouring into my head. "No wonder those people at church treat you like a loser. Because you *are* one." "No," my lips formed the word. "No.…
Alright. I need to let you know that the events of this are 100% true. I am writing this story to help the people that this applies to. I warn you, if you do not want to be depressed and upset and disturbed, please do not read. Consider you…
Marcus is driving. Through gallons of rain. He feels that he's going Quite slowly insane. For all that he feels Is anger and rage. What damage is done By the terrible teen-aged! He hates evil girl For all that she's done. His family, for th…
What's Tasha doing? Why is she here? Oh, no my dear reader! Our greatest fear, Is about to come true! She stands in the rain. And smiles at the sound Of an oncoming train! No, no, I am begging. Oh Tasha, do not! 'cause you will regret it. Y…
"How could you?" he asks, To the boy dressed in blue. "You took my promotion, And you'll take Tasha, too?" "I'm sorry!" he cries, "What more do you want? The guilt that I have, Shall forever me taunt. And what could I do? She made me do all…
Reading helps Tasha To escape and forget. Though she's sad she's not Finished Jane Eyre yet. Suddenly, footsteps, And a boy dressed in blue. "Uh, hello," Tasha says. "Do I know you?" "No," the boy whispers. "No. You do not." He seems freake…
"Hello," she purrs, To the boy dressed in blue. The boy looks at her. "May I help you?" "Oh, I have a favor," Evil girl grins. The boy ignores her And around he spins. He stacks dirty dishes Into neat little piles. Unfazed, evil girl Tries …
~*~ Being in so much pain. Remembering every moment. Only seeing his face. Knowing what he did, Every tear drips for him. Nobody can replace him. He acted like a prince. Even though he was scum. And you fell for it. Reached for him. Took …
Just when I think nothing else could go wrong. He does the complete unexpected. And ignores me. Looks away from my yearning gaze. Walks with three other disgusting girls that are touching him. Running their fingers up and down. And he smile…
This is a shot of him tickling me. In the video, Paul was taping something else, but then he heard our laughter, and shot him grabbing me and tickling me. Even though it's blurry again, the smiles on our faces are unmistakable. I love this …
If you didn't get the chance to see any of the ones I put up, just ask me to put them up again. I like this picture because even though it's so blurry, you can see the laughter on his face, and on mine. Do you see his jacket? How I'm holdin…
So. My friend sent me the video of Johnny and I, the one that Paul took on her phone. I took a few snapshots of me in his jacket, and us laughing together, and I'm gonna put up a few as my picture, so my Moments With Him posts can be brough…
- "You Look Really Torn Up" - After his gym, I waited for him and Paul to change. They came outside, and Paul tried to make a few of his silly jokes as he always does. Johnny laughed, but I still had some pain in my heart...I just looked o…
- Bad Day - I had such a bad day today. Such a bad day. Except for a few things...well...one person. You can guess who he is. I spent all morning crying before school. I told Paul everything that happened (I was at his gym again) and Johnn…
- "TICKLE HER." - As I said, Paul was there today. And Paul knows exactly how much I like Johnny. It was time for Johnny to leave, and he came to retrieve his jacket. But I was very unwilling to give it up. ;] "Emily, pleeeease?" he asked …
- Up, Up, and Away - I stayed in his jacket the whole time we were with each other. Paul was there, and he was determined to embarrass me as much as humanly possible. He threw a paper ninja star at Johnny, who was very fascinated with its …
- Princess - He was wearing this black jacket with a black v-neck that was to DIE for. I asked if I could wear his jacket and he smiled. "Yes," he said, taking it off without hesitation. He reached forward and draped it around my shoulders…
- Hands - (Today <3) I was sitting with my friends when he came over and sat next to me, smiling. We talked a bit about silly things, and then I looked at his hands. "Oh my gosh!" I cried. "Your hands are gigantic!" We pressed our hands ag…
- Tickled - He wasn't at his gym today: He was taking a math test! The silly boy. But afterwards, he saw me. And said hi. A few minutes later, he snuck up behind me and grabbed me, tickling me. I screamed out and whirled around, and he lau…
- His Gentle Pull - She lied. She lied to me. He's not a player. He's not what I've made him out to be. He's the boy I know he is. And now I am so happy. <3 Today, May 1st, 2012, I was walking out of the library, on the way to my first cla…
- Ricochet - I don't know what to do. Today I went to Johnny and Paul's gym class again, and I was so sure that when I saw Johnny I'd want to punch his face. But when I saw him, gracefully kicking the soccer ball around the field... I fell…
Evil girl watches, She watches with glee. "This is the most funny Sight man shall ever see! Two freaks are hugging, How sweet and how cute. Too bad for her He does not make a good suit. Freaks are not meant To be loved, and have joy. She's …
"What's your name?" the girl asks, And Marcus forgot, His first and last name, no, he cannot, Remember his color, Or his book that's of choice. It seems that our friend, Has now lost his voice. The girl smiles slightly, And sips from her c…
"Hi," goes a whisper, And Tasha looks up. Her water, it sloshes Against the sides of her cup. "What are you doing?" She asks with surprise. The boy has a sparkle In those pretty brown eyes. "I thought I'd find you here," He says with a smi…
I just want someone. I want a boy to kiss my tears away, and hug me until my broken heart is fixed. I want to fall asleep to his gentle voice, feeling safe and secure just by hearing it. I want to finally feel beautiful when he looks at me.…
"Why do you care If I make myself dead? And why do you never Leave my mind or my head, And why are my eyes Always drawn to your lips?" She asks Marcus's picture, And gives it a kiss. For he is the first boy That ever has cared, Even a bit …
Marcus is trying, To calm himself down, As the girl watches him, With a small, little frown. "Why do you care?" She whispers in pain. Her eyes, their color, They drive him insane. "Because," he says softly. "You just cannot die." The girl …
"No!" the boy yells, He jumps up with fright. He's pale, and he's quaking, It's quite a weird sight. Because it seems that this boy, Actually cares for this girl. And Tasha knows that There is not one in the world, Who'd care if she ended …
"Who are you?" she asks, And Marcus just smiles. A girl has not spoken to Him for a while. "You're pretty," he says, gazing at her small face. At her eyes, so blue And her skin, pale as lace. He watches with awe, As tears fill her eyes. "S…
"A salad," he says, and Tasha just blinks. "Why is HE trying To get me to EAT?" she thinks. But she sits as this strange boy Hands her some food. She hasn't eaten in days, And it sure smells good. She brings it to her mouth, Takes a micros…
"You're coming with *me*," Marcus says, and she does. Marcus is glad that She follows, because He wants her to eat More than anything else. He hates how this poor girl Is starving herself. He's heard of that thing, Where you do not eat. Bu…
Marcus stops, and he stares At the girl with those *eyes*. That are blue and more gorgeous Than any sunrise. And he bends down to pick Up the things that fell down, When he sees tears are dripping Onto the ground. His mouth drops open, As h…
The next day she cleans Out her locker of stuff. "A shot to the head Will be quite good enough." She wonders how on Earth She'll get hold of a gun. "Ah, there is evil girl. Does she have one?" Her box of possessions, In her weak little hand…
Now back to the girl, Her name is Tasha McFee. She's still crying, and whispers Stop harassing me." Her parents knock, But she cries harder and shrieks, "Why did you have me? I'm such a FREAK." And she realizes then That her life must end. …
Meet Marcus the "weird one", He's a social outcast. He wants to leave town, Wants to leave it, and fast. Cause no one understands him, Mom and Dad are on the phone: He says, "Come and get me. I feel so alone." But Mom shakes her head And g…
They were all for nothing. He does not love me. He does not care. He's a player. I'm one among many. I thought I wasn't. I thought what we had was so real... but it turns out lots of other girls of all ages have him as a costar in THEIR Dis…
Her eyes, they are tearful As evil girl glares. "What is it this time, is it my outfit, my hair?" She wishes to know why She doesn't fit in. And why being different Is such a great sin. Later she goes home And sits, crying hard. While evil …
- "Still So Warm" - This also happened today. It was after their gym and we were walking out. Yesterday, when I was in a crazy mood, Paul had taken a video of him tickling me (I'm crazy when people tickle me). He wanted to show it to Johnn…
- Sunbathing - This happened today. He came up to me, and told me he forgot his sneakers for gym. I told him he could sit with me. He smiled. We sat outside while Paul and his classmates played frisbee. He turned himself on the bench so hi…
Do you ever feel little fissures are forming in your heart... When people and things you used to love are no longer there? When someone you thought would stay was just like all the others? When the person you thought was perfect for you is …
I cannot date Johnny...my parents won't allow it. ... ... I'll still write moments...but it will only be in vain. We can't be together... </3 This is where my romance movie comes to a halt...
The rain is so beautiful. I'm just laying here, listening to its rattle as it falls on my roof... It's slowly lulling me. So soothing, so gentle... I love when Mother Nature sings me a lullaby.
By Me. Emily. :] You have to remember when there are tears in your eyes, That life was not made for a person who cries. That life is about smiling and laughing and fun, And dancing and twirling around in the sun. Life is about friendship a…
- Wallpaper - My wallpaper right now...is me and Johnny and Paul at the school weight room during their gym and my free. I was with them and we were near the dumbbells. A woman with a camera came up to us. "'scuse me, miss, could you get i…
- "Stop! My Dad's Gonna Kill Me!" - Just a normal, chilly day. I sat at my usual bench after school, waiting for my father to come pick me up. Johnny and his friend, Dan (cover) approached, and said hello. "Hi, Johnny," I smiled at him. He…
- Mouthful of Floor - I was at his gym class again, with Paul. We sat on the floor again, because this gym class was just exercising and lifting weights, and the teacher didn't care too much. People just had to put up the appearance of doi…
- "Is It?" - I was waiting for Paul and Johnny to come out the of the locker room. Johnny finally came out, grinning at me in a black v-neck t-shirt that showed off his muscles (this is NOT exaggerated. I know this sounds too good to be tr…
- Not a Hair Out of Place - Another time after gym got out. Paul decided it would be funny to muss up my hair with his hand. Quick as a flash, Johnny was in front of me. He stroked my hair until each strand was back in its place, smoothing…
Written for a friend in need. <3 By Me. Emily. Sometimes we think that we have no worth Sometimes we question the time of our birth. Sometimes we feel that who we are isn't good. And don't love ourselves in the way that we should. But we'v…
by Me, Emily. When wind blows... We fly kites. When leaves fall... We jump in piles. When snow sprinkles... We let it land on our tongues. So when a storm rolls in... Open your mouth. Close your eyes and... Drink the rain.
by Me, Emily. -I.D.- I am me. Me is I. Can that change? If me wants to be her. If her is who I want to be... Then does me change? Does me wanting to be her change who I am? Or does me stay the same? Do me and I stay together? And what if I…
by Me, Emily. Breathe. Just breathe. Hold on for a little bit longer. Look. Just look. See the joy beyond the pain. Think. Just think. Remember what you want to conquer. Know. Just know. You'll soon be happy again.
- Tired - It was another of his gym classes. I sat against the wall with Paul, class not starting yet. Johnny came in, and squeezed himself between us. "I'm so tired," he sighed, smiling at me. "Awww," I said softly, smiling back. "I'm so,…
- "Well...Now, You Can't - We were walking together after his gym class. We had left Paul behind because he was busy filling his water bottle. As we talked, a cold splash landed on my neck. I shrieked and whirled around. "That's for ditchi…
- Playing Catch (P2) - I backed away from them, right into Johnny's arms. He held onto me so I couldn't escape. "No, no!" I cried, as he lifted me into the air. "No no no!" "Aw come on, Emily, it'll be fun!" Johnny shifted me in his arms s…
- Playing Catch (P1) - I got up from my lunchtime sunbathing and kicked off my flats, picking them up so I could sprint back to my chorus class. "Here we go," Mary whispered under her breath as Johnny made a sprinting beeline for me. He gr…
- "Emily, He's Looking At You" - Lunch. That's when these little moments always happen. So on one of these sunny April days, just about two weeks ago in fact, I sat in the sun with all my friends, soaking up its rays. I had seen Johnny, wh…
by Me, Emily. Do you know what you will do to him? Do you know how he'll be? Do you know what will become of him? Do you know what *I* see? I see a broken body, sore, I see a tortured mind. I see a boy turned bitter, but He was once so ki…
- That Was Amazing - (This was a recent one! These aren't in any particular order. I'm just writing down what I remember. And there are more to come. Because these moments haven't stopped happening to me yet :]) I wrote a poem about bully…
- Like A Princess - Nine times out of ten, Johnny usually has lunch when I do. So when he sees me, he snatches me from my friends. "Captured," he says, putting an arm around my waist. Then, he always asks me this question: "Can I pick you…
(These moments, each of them, have all happened to me. Johnny is real. And these little moments are still happening. :] <3) - Almost Kisses Number Two - I have a free period when he and my guy friend, Paul (fake name) have gym. They are i…
- Almost Kisses Number One - When I have geometry on the first floor, he has another class on the second. Our paths always cross. When they do, he makes this joke, where he grabs my arm and starts pulling me back to the stairs, as if he's …
- Hands Brushing - We went from waving to brushing our hands against each other. We see each other in the halls and he reaches out his hand. I reach out mine. And for one, blissful second... We touch. Before it melts away, before his warm …
- His Puppy Dog Face - Gosh that face. He still makes it with me. And he doesn't even realize it. I would be sitting with my friends during lunch and he'd approach, with that puppy dog face up: brown eyes shining, lips parted, cheeks with …
- Small Talk - "Hi, Emily." I looked up to see a familiar, perfect face, and smiled. "Hi, Johnny." "Can I sit?" "Of course." He sat as close to me as possible, and our knees touched. "How are you?" he asked, looking at me. "I'm alright," I…
- The First Time He Held Me - It was a gigantic pep rally at our school. I don't enjoy pep rallies that much. It's usually just all the sports teams dressed up, a bunch of screaming, and cheerleaders showing off their tan legs with their t…
- Friends Again - "Hi, Emily!" Johnny would call if he saw me in the halls. At lunch, if he saw me, he'd rush to say hi to me. After school, he'd sneak up behind me and then put his arms around my shoulders. "Hi, Johnny," I'd whisper shyly…
(These moments are all true, and did happen. :] ) - The First Time We Talked After Two Years - I was sitting at a bench, texting one of my friends, waiting for my mother to pick me up from school. I had been noticing that he was around fo…